Person 2: Naaah, that's a jackal.
A slightly migratory species, jackals inhabit the library during finals week, the dining hall during feeding times, and hibernate in their dorms in between. Unlike their territorial namesake, jackals are completely oblivious of others. They create large messes and romp about at all hours of the night, showing utter disregard towards athletes and people with worthwhile goals.
Student 1: "I don't have time to wait in line behind all these lazy hipster non-athlete dbags in bartlett"
Student 2: "Yeah, fucking jackals"
Wyatt: "Has anyone seen Dan today?"
Cooper: "No, didn't you hear? he's doing 25-life for going on that jackal killing spree"
Wyatt: "Damn. Well, can't blame him."
Fashion is not a Jackals strongpoint, they are often scruffy, with signs of poor personal hygiene - but why would they need to bother about such things?
Afterall they are gods gift to women!
Jackal 1 "Urg you coming home with me tonight"
Lady "havent you got a girlfriend"
Jackal 1 "she needs to deal with it"
Jackal 2 "huh fancy giving me head, why not, well i ll just share your taxi, get out and not pay then" (outside the jackals den - not flashing your cash now are you)
Jackal 3 " ows bout it, grr, never been turned down before" (but he has, most nights!!)