White, British people looking at their invitations: "I've been here over an hour. Are you sure we've got the right church?"
Pastor, of Caribbean origin: "What you folks doin' here? Bride ain't even be in her dress yet."
White, British people looking at their invitations: "But it says two o'clock."
Pastor, of Caribbean origin: "Chill it my friends. We run tings on JMT. Soon come, soon come."
Me: You don't need to see our stapler.
<Holds up stapler> "This isn't the stapler you're looking for.
You may go about your business.
<Girl walks away, confused. Geeky friends laugh.>
HIM: Really? I'll check him out, thanks man.
ME: Jedi Mind Tricks Rules!!!
HIM: You're a fag...