Humanoid Butt-Plug (n). A person who either stops dead or moves at near-tectonic speeds through the only way into or out of a place that you need to get into or out of fast.
"Damn man, that tourist turned into an HBP when he couldn't figure out how to use his metro card to work in the only working turnstile. I must have missed four trains."
by Count Zero April 24, 2005