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19.
H2
An SUV developed by the General Motors owned Hummer. Despite what people say, the car is not driven exclusively by men with small penis syndrome (sps) or soccer moms, but that doesn't mean that SPS victims and soccer moms don't drive them. Some people use them legit, such as long trips across the country with the family and all your shit, or off-roading, though the latter is rather rare.

The H2 has also been popularized by the hip-hop world which regularly rapes SUVs and trucks by lowering them, adding useless 24 inch chrome rims, and "pimping" them with nasty vinyls. Hopefully that won't stop you from buying an H2 should you need it (off-roading or long trips where you need cargo and the family. No, soccer games that are 20 minutes away DO NOT count.).
I was driving my 530i when I saw two Hummer H2s. One had the off-road kit and had some guys and some camping-looking gear in the trunk, the other had a mom, four kids, and a bunch of soccer gear. I was lucky to follow the mom and saw that she only drove for about 10 minutes saying "I needed it".
by Dr. Thrax May 17, 2005
 
1.
H2
Massive car designed by General Motors, driven exclusively by men with penis insecurities or doctors' wives. Only gets 9 mpg, so they're basically fucked when oil starts running low and/or shooting up in price.
"Jesus, gas is back to a dollar eighty-five a gallon. I can't believe I bought that stupid fucking hulk for 50k."
"At least you're in your sexual prime, man."
"Right."
by John Galt's Urologist January 16, 2004
 
2.
H2
An "off-road" vehicle that will never see off-road use, because nobody wants to damage the overpriced thing. Usually found in cities, not far from gas stations, with overpriced rims. Seldom seen with more than one person or any cargo inside.
"For what that guy paid for that H2, he could have bought a sports car and at least had fun with it."
by shiznannigan May 14, 2004
 
3.
H2
A really fat person that guzzles food just like a H2 hummer guzzles gas.
DAMN NIGGA, H2 over there just downed a 5 foot long hotdog!
by Max Wagner September 13, 2005
 
4.
H2
a large car driven by men with small
penises, or who wish to donate money
indirectly to al-Qaeda.
That guy supports terrorists, but
he couldn't send them a donation. Instead, he bought an H2.
by Jon March 19, 2004
 
5.
H2
Hummer 2 by GM
A frekin $20 box on $30 wheels for $52000
Hummer rhymes with bummer...
by mmx January 16, 2004
 
6.
H2
The bell bottoms of the early 2000s. Kids in the future will look back at America at the turn of the century and laugh about how people in the past drove big yellow military vehicles to the movies that got 8 miles to the gallon despite incessant wars in the middle east and spiking gas prices.
(the year is 2073)
Kid (Flipping Through Textbook): Oh my god, people in the past wore these dumb ass pants called "bell bottoms." Then look! Twenty years later they drove these stupid looking H2 Hummer vehicles! Hahahahaha!
by 720mgSTEEEVE December 01, 2009
 
7.
H2
1. A fictional or figurative beverage that's a parody to the sports drink "G2", which is purposely consumed by haters or player haters that lives up to hating or jealous envy, especially for no reason.

2. An alternate name for a "Hummer H2"

3. An alternate name for a "blowjob" or a "dick suck".
ORIGIN: H2, to me in this case, is another form of "Haterade", like G2 is another form of "Gatorade".

EXAMPLE: Just because you don't drink Haterade, doesn't mean you won't drink a H2.
by Mr. Terrence L. Trezvant January 08, 2009