and to save my brothers and sisters, I have devised a plot to send a few of my elite minions to devour their souls alive, and remove them from the scorched barren soil of a shadowed place on earth where middle earth and hell itself unite...
"Honey, did you take care to carefully write a will in case...anything...should happen?...anything?"
"Yeah, mom...my buddy Jerry is gettin' my porn, and Tommy gets my cds and dvds, and you can have that fuckin' ugly shirt back..."
"what about the loincloth I crocheted for you?"
"oh yeah, that too..." (walks away grumbling, grand fucking forks...I'll stick them in my eye...
"Where the fuck is that?"