These are the men of shadows. They come from the deep, moist crevices in the Earth. Some say they are the cause of the war in the Middle East, some say they were the reason for bands like Creed and Nickelback. Some say they steal tables, steal money, and candy, but not virginities.
These are the men of the bottom clan - they feed off of negativity and greed, hate and selfishness, small penises and body odor. Their aura of hatred and shittiness is palpable, a sinking feeling that permeats the skin and drills to the soul.
They must be stopped.
They must be killed.
They are the Goochmen.