A "sport" often played by non athletic boys who play it to call themselves athletes, and crotchety old men who are trying to escape their dead end marriages. These men often play in foursomes while drinking beer and spend 30 minutes on each hole and keep everyone else from having fun as they chop the ball around and will not let anyone play through.
Bill played golf because he got tired of beating up his wife and wanted to go get wasted and piss people off at the local country club. even though he sucks at golf, he acts like he owns the place.
More than a game, it is a habitual endeavor that takes precedence over work and friends. A perpetual quest for improvement. A sport for athletes as they get older and realize their limitations. A pleasure beyond definition. Played by yourself, with a partner or in a group. Worse than drugs and better than a first time fuck.
Golf is the game of intergalactic champions. Surpassed by nothing. Takes priority over all, except being naked with the wife. She loves golf too.
A sport where you can be a professional athlete who can bench press 300lbs and do 100 sit-ups and still suck. A sport where power is not needed, but skill and practice. Manages to be the most infuriating game you'll ever play, and a joy to behold all in the course of one round.
You golf haters are all jealous because the 120lb nerd can beat you at a sport