15
person1:"Hey look its god"

person 2: "No thats a dog"
by person874563 June 08, 2009
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16
The voice that talks to you from the announcement speaker.
"Cleanup in aisle 1!"
"God? Is that you?"
by strawberryjello March 04, 2006
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17
just another celebrity asshole who demands all of our attention otherwise he wouldn't exist.
God : I am God, Moses, and their IS none else !

Moses : er, yeahhhh, wellllll, that's great n' all Sky Pappy, but seems to me the Kardashians have pretty much been conveying the same message for over ten years now ... ummm, got anything else ?

God : Okay wise ass, try this on - thou shalt have NO other gods than me and thou WILT serve ONLY ME all the days of thine life !

Moses : Hmmm, impressive comeback, but come to think of it, didn't Kanye West say the same thing at last month's Coachella festival ? Er, I kinda think he did, so, I dunno, you might wanna check with a lawyer about maybe, plagiarism ?

God : Okay fuckface, if YOU don't kiss MY ass, I WILL kill YOU and blow up that silly-assed planet you currently live on !!!

Moses : Wellll, if you kill me a) you kill the messenger and then no one learns about your commandments and b) if you blow up the planet, then there's no one left to conceptualize you, much less mention your name. Therefore, technically, you wouldn't exist anymore, soooooo .... I'd be kinda careful throwing 'round such boldface threats, 'now'msayin'G ?

God : Oh, fuck you, Moses !

Moses : (to audience) see what I mean folks ? Just another celebrity asshole ...
by Virgin Suicides May 27, 2017
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18
Apparently a being worth more than 356 urban dictionary definitions :D
Dude....my god, GOD has so many damn definitions!
by MyNameIsRemy June 10, 2007
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19
billions of people have died in the name of god
by b3n February 13, 2005
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20
You can't see him because he is not there.
Brasil: So, you're saying that God is the only way to eternal salvation?
HyunGyum: Yeah man, God is all loving and he will save you.
Brasil: Then, why does God make bad people go unpunished?
HyunGyum: hmm...
Brasil: Why doesn't God save the hungry children of the world? That doesn't sound like the "all-loving God" I have heard so much about.
HyunGyum: ...
Brasil: That's right! God doesn't do all of that because he doesn't exist!

Atheists: 1
Believers: 0
by BrasilStyle May 05, 2009
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21
God, the omniscient, primordial and eternal who created man in his own image and therefore posseses a digestive system, sense organs, limbs and other attributes that would be useless to an immortal being. If God came first, what would he eat or walk upon? Why would he have those five senses if nothing to sense yet existed? And if he has 'always' been here, how long did he sit around doing nothing until he decided to invent the Universe? And why? And if he hadn't yet invented the universe, what exactly was he sitting on? Where is he going to exist if there is nothing to exist in? And what is wrong with the idea that we all just expire and disintegrate and rot?
by Jon December 26, 2003
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