Scientists have discovered a new element to add to the periodic table. It's called girlfriendium, and it has the unique ability out of all of the elements to actually decrease ones amount of free time and physical energy. It also has a strange side effect that differs from person to person. Sometimes it gives long lasting erections, others it destroys all sex drive. And has the uncanny ability to turn Womanium into unobtainium.
Womanium is pretty weird stuff... like once a month it metaporphasizes into bitchium for a few days, then turns back, but one can better experience this when a Girlfriendium is created first. Womanium when combined with Gold often turns becomes one of the Analiod metals.