SGT Smart: "It's not worth it, trust me Fort irwin is the most hated duty station in the United States Army."
Soldier: "It's not California like in CHIPS; It's Fort Irwin. Just shut the fuck up. You don't know what the fuck you're talking about."
Friends: "..Are you okay? You used to be such a sweet boy..."
For those of you men looking to get laid, keep looking. There are no women at Fort Irwin and the ones that are here fall into one of the following categories: fat and ugly, pregnant, or an alcoholic.
However, there is an AWESOME night club on base - Cock Wave, I mean, err Shock Wave! It's a cluster fuck of sausages and intoxicated soldiers who hate their lives because they are literally signed to a contract saying they must either live at Fort Irwin, or blow your brains out.
Once in a rare, rare while, you will meet someone who actually enjoys living in the fuckin desert. This person is automatically a douche bag and probably hasnt enjoyed much of anything in their life. If you ever meet this person, please tell them to go "fuck themselves" and keep moving.
Friend 2: "Wow! That really sucks. I heard its the worst place on Earth."