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1.
A seafood restaurant that loses its magic the further you move inland. As you move toward the geographic center of the continental United States, you will be prompted by a sign on the side of a dubious brick compound to 'bang on window with spoon for service.'

Once the eurasian bandit working the window has taken your order, he'll either emerge with a bag full of mercury poisoning or a fistful of barbiturates, depending on what keywords or phrases you may have unwittingly uttered.
I went to Flipperz and hardly even felt the induced sense of impending doom that comes with eating tainted flesh! It barely tasted like oil spill at all!
by Nude Fontanelle August 14, 2009