1. The substance in question must be procured free of charge (i.e. found, stolen, or given to the person)
2. The person must use the substance to achieve an altered state of consciousness.
Chris: "So you're F.U.F.F. Congratulations!"
George: "Dude, I'm wicked fuff'd right now!"
Matt: "On what?"
George: "Paint, cough syrup, and non-prescription pain killers!"
Matt: (nods approvingly) "Good looks, man!"
The comical value of using this is great - from a distance it sounds exactly like "the big one". A quick explanation later and "blammo!" you got yourself a new classroom word.
Cool kid: Oh, fuff!
Cool kid: It's coo' maan. Chill your fuffin' ass.
Used to describe the inevitability of desirable (i.e hot) women having grotesque, often obese women befriend them, and therefore having these 'Fuffs'tag along with them at various gatherings such as clubs and parties (The end result being innocent men out looking for a piece of some fine poon getting frustrated to no end)
*Thanks to Mick Joel and all the boys who hate Fuffs!
"I'd love to go over and chat to that fine walking headjob, however the Fuff with the muffin top protruding beneath her saggy pathetic breasts bearing those hideous tumbleweed-esque nipples is certainly making me think twice!"
"Yo dude check out that Fuff! I name her 'Herpes Queen'(HAHAHA TAKE THAT MADISON!!!)"
"I'd hate to be the bloke who gets himself stuc with that Fuff"
"That Fuff should think about waxing her neck hair!"
Also an alternative for the f word, discovered by accident when a pikey was arguing whilst eating a kebab.
I wish you would fuff off.
2. An expression of discontent
Johnny: I'm going to die if I can't pee now!
Mom: Oh, fuff! You can wait until the next rest stop.
Teacher: And now you have to write a 10 page report.
Jimmy: Awww, fuff! I didn't even read the story!