Hell on earth, where soft southern big mouths either kick people in in packs of five on one, or phone the police if you beat them.
Centre of ignorance for the universe, where shoe sizes rule over IQ's. The population is made up of some of this planets stupidest people, know all know nothings who have the audacity to call the west country, Wales and North and anywhere else they have never been nor understand.
Essex people are only superior to the head lice their retard children carry behind their ears. Burger munching, good fight talking, Cologne drenched dullards.
"Essex I believe is hell on earth, Chelmsford is perhaps the most stupid and dullest place on the face of the planet"
William Shakespear
by Dr Jack Pays January 31, 2009
34 more definitions
Top Definition
The richest county in the United Kingdom. Essex is NOT full of chavs or retards or whatever these idiots say above this definition.
People from Essex dislike chavs just as much as anybody else here does.

There are some complete idiots in esses but, isnt there idiots everywhere?
"Essex - the richest county in the UK"
by RealAlternative May 29, 2005
Worst reputation in England for slags. They are ment to be the easiest. However, you shouldn't judge as that's probably just bullshit. I'm sure they are all lovely.
She is like an Essex girl!OMG
by iulvhnlhlxuyrg January 10, 2008
One of the richest counties in England
Jealous northerners with small penises, ugly faces, fat women and tractors feel the need to bitch about thier superiors.
by ROARING HELL June 05, 2004
A place constantly stereotyped.
It's funny because i'm an Essex girl, born and bred in one of the 'worst' parts, yet i'm not a slag, not pregnant, don't wear burberry or any fake crap, can talk properly and i'm well educated.
Go figure. :)
Oh god, she's from Essex, must be a slag.
by NotASlag October 28, 2008
South Eastern County bordering London, which despite popular belief, consists primarily of conservative voting middle – upper classes seeking an escape from the city. Unfortunately tainted by areas such as Romford and Southend, where the amount of chavs, scallies and other such fake – Burberry wearing scum are contained and looked down upon. Highlights include Chigwell, Loughton, Buckhurst Hill, Epping where the amount of real Armani, Versace, Prada and Gucci being worn, and Porsches, Jaguars and Ferrari’s on the roads have a value greater than the gross amount of money that vermin on state benefit, like those found in Romford, con from our government.
Areas with high houseprices, high avearage wage and at least one car of a value greater than 35K
by You wish you lived in Essex May 28, 2005
1) much maligned county in south east england. canvey island, essex was one of the few places to submit a realistic bid against london for the 2012 olympics.

2) contains popular domestic holiday destinations such as southend, shoeburyness and basildon.

3) inhabitants also speak with what is considered the most aurally pleasing of english accents. it is also the most common tongue in places such as prague and benidorm.

1) people say that about essex cos its a cultural desert, innit!

2) our caravan in clacton-on-sea was torched last weekend!

3) chardonnnaaaahy, we goin to bluewortah dis sahndeee?
I dunnooaah kerrahy, aint lakeside nearah?
by Roaryourarseoff June 22, 2006
Noun: a 238-ton whaling ship, based out of Nantucket Island (USA), famously sunk on November 20, 1820 in an encounter with "Mocha Dick", an albino sperm whale defending his pod against human predation. Incident widely acknowledged as the direct inspiration for Herman Melville's 1851 novel "Moby-Dick, or The Whale".
"Following the second hull strike by Mocha Dick, the Essex crew had only minutes to provision the surviving boats and cast-off before the ship sank."
by speedog June 13, 2010

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