Guy 2: Go to Elon University.
"Great, I'm at Elon! I'm a double major in Communications and Economics and I'm going to Spain next semester!"
a tip: get to know the police officers. if you're nice to them, they'll be nice to you.
"Today we salute you trendy Elon girl. In your pointed-toes stilettos, you understand that having blisters and cramped pinky toes is a small price to pay for the approval of your peers. Sure, your Vera Bradley bag and oversized pearls may appear to have been stolen from your grandmother, but we rest assured that your daddy bought them for you fair and square. And yes, you may be snobby to every guy that appraoches you, but we know that you're only doing them a favor by helping them understand that they are, in fact, gay. So here's to you trendy Elon girl, because everyone knows that behind your dyed blonde hair and falsely-tanned skin there sits a real person in the driver seat of that lexus SUV; and that real person... is a pale brunette."
Most of the chicks already have boyfriends or are not interested in your punk ass.
There are an extremely high number of gays at Elon. Just when you thought you knew, your bottom hurts the next morning.
The Fraternities and Sororities are the shit, but then again, what isn't at Elon?
Beware: It is (or will) become full of preppy, rich northerners who pay FULL tuition and then argue they can't put gas in there Mercedes.
Everyone has a Mac, gels there hair and has no idea about Burlington, the town full of poor folk next door.
Smith Jackson is a legend with his sexual invasion emails
Elon football is surprisingly good, even if they are half brain dead when it comes to academics.
There are way to many fountains that cost ungodly sums of money just to advance the country club look and feel of Elon.
A car is ESSENTIAL here.
Avoid ALE at all costs: they will fuck you.
Hell yeah, its easy as hell, has easy access to liquor and full of chicks! where are you going to school?
An all boys college
2. I heard Elon just got a new Cruz Thru.
3. The goyim think elon means "oak" but it really means "shrub."