85
A homosexual annoying sparkling vampire from the lamest vampire series EVER!
Edward Cullen is the most stupidest vampire ever!
by mmmtttt April 28, 2010
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Cleveland Steamer Plush

The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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87
Fangirl: EhMaGawd i just luv Edward Cullen!!!!

Fanboy: Trust me, you don't have a chance!

Normal person: *Shoots them and then self*

Crowd: *Awards aforementioned normal person a medal of honor in combat*
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Donkey Punch Plush

10" high plush doll.

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88
A fictional vampire that, despite being overly obsessive, seems to be the "perfect guy" for most women. Human versions of said vampire can usually be found in county jails or in court rooms being presented with their very own restraining order.
Dude, did you hear about Billy last night? His girlfriend broke up with him and he pulled an Edward Cullen. Now he's in prison!
by HypocriticPope April 16, 2009
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Cleveland Steamer Plush

The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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89
1. The horrible, ugly, smug vampire from Twilight, that makes you wish that teenage girls had taste in men.

2. Exclamation of disgust.
1. Edward Cullen should die, but whatever. He's not even real.

2. You think that modern pop music is better than classic rock? Well, Edward Cullen to you, I say!
by StarshineTrip May 15, 2009
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Cleveland Steamer Plush

The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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90
A fictional vampire in the series Twilight. Many fangirls obsess over him even though:

A) He isn't real
B) He's a vampire
C) He's in a book

Most girls won't talk to boys now because they aren't like "Edward."
True Story:

Guest_runner113: hey
Guest_edwardluver10: hi
Guest_runner113: just curious, who is edward?
Guest_edwardluver10: twilight series
Guest_runner113: oh... and why do you love him?
Guest_edwardluver10: he is very chivelrous and very romantic
Guest_edwardluver10: he is also a hot vampire
Guest_runner113: well, how can someone be 1) hot and a vampire 2) hot in a book
Guest_runner113: i just can't see how words can make somone appear hot
Guest_edwardluver10: the way the author describes him
Guest_edwardluver10: plus the movie
Guest_runner113: um... ok... you do know he's not real right?
Guest_edwardluver10: yes
Guest_runner113: i don't know, i'm not following this
Guest_edwardluver10: still... hes not the average burn to death b/c of sunlight
Guest_runner113: so let me get this straight... you're in love with a fictional vampire who is hot because the author says he is?
Guest_edwardluver10: not real love... u know how many girls love edward cullen?
Guest_edwardluver10: many!!!
Guest_runner113: yeah, and it's SICK
Guest_runner113: find a real boy
Guest_runner113: there are plenty of us
Guest_runner113: and all of us hate this "edward" you speek of
Guest_edwardluver10: yeah, b/c he is actually a good person... he shows respect!
Guest_runner113: i know you don't believe this, but over 60% of guys show respect
Guest_edwardluver10: he doesnt go and say its sick
Guest_edwardluver10: i believe it,, its just the 40% are the ones i meet
Guest_runner113: but he thrives off the blood of people
Guest_runner113: and a lot of girls aren't respectful either
Guest_edwardluver10: no, read the books... he and his family feed off the blood of animals not humans
Guest_runner113: then why doesn't he eat meet?
Guest_edwardluver10: i know a lot of girls are rude... u probably think im one of them
Guest_edwardluver10: they dont eat food, they gag it up
Guest_runner113: all i'm saying is that edward isn't real and never will be real and obsessing over him is a waste of time and will get you nowhere
Guest_runner113: please pass this on to other twilight fans
Guest_edwardluver10: no
Guest_edwardluver10 has left the chat
by CommonSenseIsntSoCommon April 10, 2009
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Golden Shower Plush

He's warmer than you think.

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91
A complete an utter disappointment to vampires everywhere. Why you ask? Here are a few reasons:
-He fucking sparkles.
-He pervs on young women (and men for all we know)
-He has commitment issues ("Bella I love, Bella I'm leaving" ... I mean come on dude, make up your fucking mind!)
-He is a 'vegetarian vampire.'
-He is 'to good for anyone.' AKA he is full of himself.
There are so many more but I just do not have time to name all the crappy things about him.
There is a creepy guy in my room last night who was watching me sleep." ... "Oh it must have been Edward Cullen.
by AlphaWolfMika January 26, 2011
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Golden Shower Plush

He's warmer than you think.

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