Epstein and Steinbrenner's Personal Network
Formally know as Entertainment and Sports Programming Network, they offically changed their names to Epstein and Steinbrenner's Personal Network when they decided to focus on two MLB teams, the Red Sox and Yankees. Their main headlines usually include:
*Manny being Manny
*Manny Ramirez being Manny Ramirez
*MANNY TRADED TO THE LA DODGERS
*David Ortiz hits Homerun Number (insert #)
*David Ortiz eats burger number (insert #)
*A-Rod and Madonna???
*A-Rod and Jeter breaks up with Madonna rumors.
*Joba Chamberlain as a possible Cy Young Candidate (No Joke, actually real)

With the occasional headlines of:
Evan Longoria
Tiger Woods
Brett Farve
Evan Longoria
The New York Mets
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
LA Dodgers (only because Manny is there)
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
Brett Farve
MLB News
Subscribe

* MLB eyeing instant replay as early as late August
* Oblique puts Lowell on DL | Red Sox top Rangers
* After fouling ball off foot, Jeter sits | Yanks lose
* Cubs sweep Braves by combined score of 18-2
* Crawford opts for hand surgery | TB-OAK Live
* A's third baseman Chavez has shoulder surgery
* Quentin sits out, but balanced ChiSox top Royals
* Sheffield says he's not expecting trade | Tigers fall
* Rumor Central: Rays making push for Aurilia? Insider

Four Yankees/Red Sox headlines in the top 5 from ESPN website 8/13/08
by Person who hates ESPN August 13, 2008
A network that shuns the best sport in the world, hockey, and obsesses over the worst league in the world, the NBA. And also obsesses over the stupidest things for the LONGEST time (ie. penn st, tebow, jeremy lin, NFL in general)
"And now ESPN's top plays, or should i say top play, because it's the same dunk over and over that we have all seen hundreds of times before."
by amcoho4 March 13, 2012
Claims to be a "worldwide leader in sports". a malignant misconception since they don't cover F1 racing,rugby or motoGP just to mention a few international sports!!
More like the "leader in US sports!"

1st character:"I wish ESPN could at least cover the F1 racing highlights….."
2nd character:"…SSShhhhhh....they are talking about Barry Bonds on ESPN Hollywood!!!!!!"

by muri29 September 25, 2006
A sports channel known as "The Worldwide Leader in Sports," however, this is inaccurate, since they only focus on two sports leagues: the NFL and the NBA. MLB? They hardly talk about it. NHL? What's that? Popular sports leagues from around the world? Forget it. The World Cup, which only happens once every four years? Here is some irrelevant NBA Free Agency news, and I use the term news lightly.

ESPN is also known for obsessing over LeBron James to a sickening degree. If you are just dying to know what superteam LeBron will form next, what LeBron had for breakfast, the contents of his garbage, or his reading material of choice while on the toilet, just watch ESPN. You'll be able to find out within 5 minutes.
ESPN Anchor: Now, let's go live to LeBron's house where Brian Windhorst is on the scene. Brian, what can you tell us?

Brian: Well, after stalking LeBron for three days straight, I learned that he brought home McDonald's last night, but he did not finish his french fries. I think this could be a sign that LeBron is leaning toward leaving Miami, possibly to go back to Cleveland. I'll have more information once I finish sifting through his garbage.

ESPN Anchor: That's Brian Windhorst with the latest on everything LeBron. Coming up next on SportsCenter, we debate LeBron's recent purchase of deodorant, and what it means for his future in the NBA.
by zuawg July 10, 2014
to watch some porn term meant for boys only
what are you doing johnny. NOTHING JUST WATCHIN E.S.P.N.!
by assfradg February 13, 2007
Popular Sports Channel. Acronym that stands for Eastern Sports Promotion Network. Will usually see things like the latest Terell Owens coverage, drooling over Tom Brandy, the latest routene Derek Jeter play, the latest Manny Ramirez bitch fit, or why the ACC is better than all other conferences. Also has lame stories that try to prove sports worth when in all aspects it's just a game. Also made watching cards on T.V. popular. Also never stops covering the Chicago Cubs, Barry Bonds, LeBron James, Kobe Bryan/Phil Jackson, and Lance Armstrong (a.k.a. national fraud).
Friend: Dude, did you watch ESPN tonight?
Me: Yeah, they did not say who won the world series in 2005 but I'm so glad I know that T.O. has a contract dispute, and just what the yankees and red sox need to do get to the World Series in 2006.

Or great programing like this:
Peter Gammons: I know the Red Sox suck but I just think everyone wants to see them win the world series again.
Harold Renyolds: I think the Cubs are going to win although their manager is a dolt, they have no bullpen, and half their pitching has never finnished a full season, I like their chances.
by Dusticles November 13, 2005
An acronym for the phrase "Everyone smoke pot now"
"Yo yo yo! ESPN bitches!" Then proceed to get blazed.
by The Bag Bandit December 02, 2010
The ability to see future sporting event outcomes.
I have ESPN.
by tortugadude May 27, 2009

Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×