Idiot jerk: No he couldn't!
Idiot jerk: ouch you rammed me with your head and killed me!
Dwarf:Bwah ha ha!
Elves themselves were created to be burned. Hence the name "wood elf," short for "wood substitute."
For a period of 1000 years the Elves pounded the little Dwarves' ass holes day in and day out. They were restricted to a population control managed by the Elves so they could not revolt. The Dwarves finally turned the tables and took over the Elves and killed most of them by the use of thrusting their axe handles into the pootbox of the Elves. Most Elves were allergic to this act thus it killed them.
During the time periods the Dwarves were free of getting fudge packed they were a powerful group of people and were rich with rare types of metal, ore, and cocaine. They stuck with cocaine and couldn't keep up with the demand of their dealers so Middle Earth sodomized them for not producing enough. Ultimately the Dwarves were killed though because they smelled like cabbage.
Dwarves are alcohol dependent. They can survive without alcohol but they do slowdown becoming sluggish and grouchy. Dwarves uses alcohol as energy rather then intoxicant. NEVER DRINK WITH DWARVES.
Dwarves love gems & metals and much of there time is spent underground. This can lead to consequences for dwarves who don't get out, mainly cave adaptation.
Dwarves are a friendly race trading with the smelly elves and the humans. Dwarves and Goblins are natural enemies. after seeing each other they will immediately start kicking, punching, and biting each other to death. Dwarves mostly ignore kobold.
Dwarves are a Monarchy. A king who is supreme leader, barons who command regions, and Mayors who rule settlements. All positions can be held by either gender.
Living up to 170 years of age dwarves are very clever building complex traps and tools out of whatever is on hand (rocks)and are the only race afflicted by fay-moods that make them seek out parts to craft items of legendary quality, needs not being met can lead to depression, rage, insanity, and nudism.
Killing animals enemies and plants is ok so long as they are sanctioned. A dwarf committing assault and vandalism are punished. Killing, treason, ect. are punished by death. Lying is a personal matter.