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1.
To jerk or not to jerk? That is the question. Essentially, you take your little lady out to a nice evening on the town, treating her to a fine meal and such. Being the nice guy you are, you invite her back home to the tune of a few hits of LSD. 30 minutes later you find yourself masterbating at a furious pace of 100 beats a minute, chasing your girl around the house screaming "I am Spartacus" and tossing little pickles at the back of her head.

You then wake up the next morning to your car keys in your ass and a pug humping itself.
"Dr. Jerkyll and Miss. Hyde, the gift that keeps on giving."
by sac-a-jew-ias July 02, 2012