|1.||Double Fisted Monkey Style|
A discipline of masturbation characterized by extraordinary vigor and skill, as well as enormous genital peril. In trained hands, double fisted monkey style can form a glorious, balanced union between a man and his fingers. In untrained hands, it can lead to genital fracturing, inversion, or worse.
"Dude, Bob tried Double Fisted Monkey Style last night."
"Oh no! I warned him! Did he survive?"
"The hospital said he might eventually recover partial use of his legs. They dug his penis out of a tree two miles downwind."
"That stupid son of a bitch."