A "dirty spatula" is when a guy has junk shat upon, and then stomped upon with platform shoes.
It may not be the most profoundly disturbing or even most potentially damaging sexual act ever conceived, but I would not care to be on the receiving end of a "dirty spatula", if you know what I mean.
by Mattzog and Kilna February 12, 2008
When you blow your load into a "special friends" hand and then take their hand and slap their face with it.
DUDE she gave me the handback last night so I had to finish her off with the dirty spatula
by Space Monkey 4 life September 08, 2015