Top definition
A person who would sell just about anything to make a buck. They are cheap and not very sociable. They make terrible friends because they constantly try to screw people out of money. They prefer to do business in the cheapest way possible. Dirt merchants are nothing more than scum of the earth...
John says: "Hey Sally, I need a laptop computer that's cheap."

Sally says: "Well John, why don't you go buy one from that dirt merchant down the street!"
by Lorne S Grant February 14, 2006
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2
A derogatory term for a scuzzy wannabe-hippie drug dealer, primarily selling skunkweed and possibly a little fake blotter acid for good measure. Always unwashed, with greasy matted hair (typically dreadlocks), the dirt merchant has horrible B.O. with an over-stench of patchouli mixed into it. Filthy feet poking out of Birkenstocks and lots of hemp jewelry are a hallmark of the dirt merchant, as is the inability to form a coherent sentence. Favorite bands are The Grateful Dead (of course), Phish, and the String Cheese Incident. Probably homeless, though he or she may live in a busted-down bus or VW Vanagon, probably with at least 5 other dirt merchants and one or two stinky dogs.
That dirt merchant just tried to sell me a bag of shake for $35!

Shit, remember that dirt merchant I met who was slinging acid next to that Port-o-Potty at the String Cheese Incident show? She totally gave me crabs, man!
by Lady Tangerine August 03, 2010
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3
A person, most likely middle-eastern, who takes a shit, wipes their ass on a rug, and then sells the rug for profit.
Mohammed is a dirt merchant.
by Jay April 09, 2005
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4
A broad term applicable to those who reek of cigarettes, cheap body spray, and 84 chrysler lebaron. These folks are highly adept at pop culture but lack any semblance to intelligence, but they will disguise this by saying they are street smart. Usually dirt merchants will know everything about every topic. The men usually grow unusually long goatees because they think it is intimidating.
Dude your friend who works down at the cabinet shop who thinks he has a cool grow room with flourescent lights and owns that damn dog thats outta control and jumps all over you when you come in is a total dirt merchant.

Dude that dirt merchant smells like the inside of someones asshole and I can see fleas jumping out of his ridiculously long goatee.
by Norcalmike February 12, 2008
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5
derogatory term for paparazzi, or anyone involved in the tabloid magazine/celebrity gossip business
“those guys at TMZ are a bunch of dirt merchants”

“Perez Hilton is a fucking low life, piece of shit, ass face, dirt merchant”
by tl77 November 23, 2010
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6
Brandon your such a Dirt merchant
by Nick March 21, 2005
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7
Those nubs from newtown are all a bunch of dirt merchants!
by Mayor Adam West May 26, 2004
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