Any rod thingy that simulates a cock that a woman or man can stick in her or his mouth, pussy, or anus. Some vibrate, while others don't. Dildos are made of different materials.
Women and men, listen.

After you stick your dildo in your ass, do not suck on it or put it in your pussy. There is shit or at least fecal residue in your ass (remember, shit comes out of your asshole), and you don't want to eat shit. Otherwise, you might as well pick up your poop from the toilet bowl and take a bite. And forget about wiping your ass because that's basically what you are doing when you rub that ass-plugged dildo all over your pussy, your mouth, and, god forbid, my mouth and ass.

Separate dildos for ass and mouth.
by sukebe November 18, 2006
Get the dildo mug.
The giant gummy worm inside your mothers sock drawer
Person 1 - "Hey Guys, I found a Giant Gummy Worm in mommy's drawer."
Person2 - "Dude... You should totally bring it to school."

Dildo - A plastic tube used for intense pleasure

“When it comes to sex: some men treat women as objects; some women treat objects as men.”

― Mokokoma Mokhonoana
by SaoGamingGT March 1, 2017
Get the dildo mug.
1) <Slang> A plastic or metal substitute for a man's erected penis; Sometimes is equiped with a vibration feature; Usually designed to be much larger than a normal human male's penis

2) <botany> A columnar cactaceous plant of the West Indies (Cereus Swartzii)
1) I bought her a dildo and a pair of slippers, so if she doesnt like the slippers, she can go fuck herself.

2) -That plant is so columnar
-hey man, we're in the west indies
-whoa >_>
by Matt's Mom November 1, 2006
Get the dildo mug.
Cartman: Mom, Kitty's being a dildo!!!
Carman's Mom: Then I know a certain little kitty kitty who's sleeping with mommy tonight.
by Fonzeh July 27, 2004
Get the dildo mug.
Much like the meteor that killed the dinosaurs, the dildo will eventually lead the the extinction of the human race.
Who needs men anyways, I have my dildo to keep me company.
by Justin Mozuch December 29, 2005
Get the dildo mug.