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1.
A disorder named after early 20th century German physician Hanz F. Diksfertoas. Commonly developed by indoor kids or more often than not, during the winter. Diksfertoas' syndrome causes sensitivity to the feet when bare. It occurs when one wears socks and shoes too often and does not partake in anything foot strenuous, causing soft feet. When encountering a more rugged environment, without their protective gear, the afflicted tend to walk around like dumb asses with really sensitive dicks for toes.
John: Honey, where are my gay little slippers?

Jane: Why can't you just man up and get the mail barefoot?!

John: Damnit woman! You know I've got Diksfertoas' syndrome!

Jane: If only you had dicks for dicks syndrome!

John's nosey neighbor: DAMN SON! ARE YOU PLAYING KNIGHTS OF THE TOLD REPUBLIC ON NINTENTOLD 64 OR DID YOU JUST GET FUCKING TOLD?!

John's apathetic cat: Zing, John. You've got a small penis and girl feet.
by Dances With Limes January 25, 2013