"PLEASE! refrain from tugging on my dangle ball, it's not a cow utter. it has feelings just like you and me."
"I can't tell the difference between my dangle ball and my penis. they're the same length. maybe I should ASK JEEVES"
"would you like to see the pendulum range of my dangle ball? eh? eh?
just please, do not puncture it with any sharp objects. it is fragile and sterile"