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1.
Origins of the individual known as DVGBA, or simply "DVG", are unknown. However, those who subscribe to Darwin's theories may conclude that he could be a human/hamster hybrid. An avid follower of the children's cartoon show Hamtaro, he sees no problem with this despite being around 21 years of age. Also sees no problem with posting on a Hamtaro message board frequented by preteen girls, nor having a 14-year old "online girlfriend".

This specimen is known to have an extraordinary memory, as he is able to bitch about thing which happened years ago as if they were yesterday. Believes that a group of message board members known as the Illuminati, supposedly led by RealGTX, is out to get him after his whine fest failed to win him any support. Posts about this supposed "tragedy" on sites such as Urban Dictionary, possibly while repairing the holes in his tinfoil hat. Due to this persecution complex, continues to make pathetic insults directed at RealGTX, who has since left aforementioned message board as well.

DVGBA claims to have a job and be going to college, but these are mere rumors and cannot be confirmed as he has only been seen outside the house when being forced to buy cigarettes for his older brother. Cannot fathom the reason he was driven away from a message board despite his horrible personality, disturbing habits, and lack of a decent sense of humor. This situation could be defined as being in denial.
"Check out this stupid shit DVGBA posted in my guestbook. Can you believe he's still at it?"