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1.
The most badass, hardcore, motherfucking squirrel you'll ever know. He drinks. He urinates. He vomits. He's everything you'd ever want in a mammal.
My name is Conker. Insert movie parody here.
by Paul Newman February 08, 2004
 
2.
a game played in British schools.
Horse chestnuts hung on a shoe lace, both kids take turns to hit each others conkers until they smash.
Sounds a pile of shit but it was good at the time.
I've got a ten time winning conker
by xxx April 23, 2003
 
3.
A British term for the fruit/seed of a horse chestnut tree. Commonly called a chestnut.

Can also refer to the game called 'conkers' played using the chestnuts in which two opponents attempt to shatter the other's conker. The conkers are both suspended on a length of string and the players take turns to swing at the other's. The player with the conker last remaining on its string is the winner.
Young Boy 1: "Ouch man, you hit my finger!"
Young Boy 2: "Well that's the inherent risk of playing conkers my friend. You know what you signed up for!"
by ph4sma September 14, 2011
 
4.
Short for Conker's Bad Fur Day, one of the best video games for the nintendo 64. It has a great 1 player mode and tons of 2 player minigames such as War, Deathmatch, Beach, Colors, etc. Tons of fun with 4 people, invite your friends over!
"I'm going to play some Conker's. Wanna come?"
by KaiserMonkey September 14, 2003
 
5.
Used as an expletive instead of a proper expletive around children.
Oh conkers i've forgotten to turn the bath tap off!
by DynamoBri July 29, 2010
 
6.
slang for testicles
I banged my conkers on the crossbar of my bike
by adrian December 05, 2003
 
7.
fun, laughs, absurdity
We went skinny dipping just for conkers.
by streed51 May 30, 2008