The origins of the word itself are unclear and there are a few theories, perhaps all of them correct. Nonetheless, the current criteria for being a chav applies as laid out in this dictionary and no doubt, as culture dumbs-down even more, the definition will need to be updated. Chavs will no doubt eventually, despite their in-bred lack of intelligence, cotton-on to the fact that burberry and it’s current associations foster great hatred and negativity amongst the majority of the population. This factor however, could backfire, as Chavs could consider the perpetuation of hatred and negativity as a great contribution to humanity, even if it is directed towards themselves from others.
The most recent example of a celebrity Chav is Kenzie in Big Brother. (I can’t remember the name of the boy-band he is in – so uncool – but I know it had the word “Crew” or “Squad” whatever, in the name). In fact, Kenzie actually said “no” initially to being in the BB house, but when he thought long and hard about it, decided to say yes as the word “brother” as in, “bruv-va” or “bruv” for short, sounded cool and he thought it would really do wonders for his street-cred. Kenzie is actually white, but to see his clothes and hear him speak, you would think he is black.
Chavism represents a cultural link with the Trailer Park Trash in The States which is actually a sub-culture of black America. They both inspire each other. The lower the common denominator they appeal to, the cooler they are! Both of these cultural factions are represented by the highly evolved people picked to appear on the “Jerry Springer” show. Due to the speed of the transmission of information in modern times ex. Internet, TV etc, cultures very quickly pick up bits from other cultures, bounce off each other, and this happens at such a rate that no-one exactly knows who originated what. But as society has evolved, and that is the key word, “evolved”, chavism did not happen overnight but evolved as culture dumbed-down and it became clear that it was not “cool” to aspire to anything other than basic animal appetites (for junk food, sex, cheap bling etc). Perhaps devolved is a better word!
Jordan is the ultimate aspiration of female Chavs. She is actually much more stupid than the average Chavette which is why they (chavettes) admire her so much. She is actually now trying to pull herself out of the Chav-pit she has made for herself by writing a book about herself, no doubt mostly really ghost-written by someone else, paid for from the proceeds of all the modelling jobs she has done which evolve around her flubber-inflated chest (but isn’t she a great business woman- fuckin what?), and is trying to appear in “serious” programmes such as Book Award Ceremonies. Unfortunately, she is still seriously boring as she has neglected her mind in favour of her chest , hoping that the more silicone she has pumped into those tits, the more self-esteem and intelligenceshe will attain and therefore rather than work hard and learn, just go see the surgeon again. Easy!! Her tits have now become self-funding entities (get it?) in their own right.
So my good friends, that is my input.
Chavette 2 - wikked innit....didja get ya tablets sorted for dat smell cumming from ya minge?
WARNING! A CHAV IS NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH A ZOMBIE WHICH THEY BEAR RESEMBELANCE TO IN MANY TERMS. USE THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE ON THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, BY GOING TO A CHAV INFESTED AREA. THE ZOMBIES WILL IGNORE SAID AREA, THINKING THE DISEASE HAS ALREADY SPREAD TO THAT AREA
*being in essex, you will probably be "shanked" or "have a cap popped in yo ass"
In northern ireland they are known as spides
Chav 2: X -factor is better than oor hippie music!!
Can be spotted wearing mainly fake versions of burberry, track suits which have been ucked into thier socks, white trainers and endless amounts of cheap gold argos rings and chains.
Seen with a high, tight ponytail/poker straight hair, fake tan and bad makeup. Will wear tracksuit bottoms/white skinny jeans and normally a plain top with a large poofy jacket. can wear either dolly shoes or desiegner trainers and emense amounts of, again, cheap gold argos jewelery.
additions to this can be chav babies (born and expecting), fags, cheap nd illegal alchahol, mobile phones and baseball caps and hoodie (both hood and cap worn at same time).
On thier own hey are safe but in large numbers be prepared.
The only way to rid Britain of these things is to show them that we are united and beat the shit out of them instead of trying to ignore them and walk away.
another way is to stop calling them chavs and instead call them somehing they would not want to be associated with although that may be difficult.
But keep in mind its good to kick them when they are down!
Man: *knocks chav out*
several theories to the origination of the word most popular being council housed and violent
can be found in most towns or cities outside McDonald's and other fast food outlets trying to intimidate with large numbers though this always fails with the oldest member of the group being 15 with a can of white ace
usually they will be abusive to anyone who does not comply to their requests such as gizza fag (roughly translated by experts to give me a cigarette though we can not be sure)
They like to dress in the height of fashion usually a Adidas tracksuit or some variation with there baseball caps at a 45 degree to 90 degree angle
Female chav's or chavettes like to dress similar or wear skimpy tops that to any normal human looks ridiculous the chavette almost always has their hair pulled back for reasons unknown but gives a shocked or surprised appearance to the chavette
both male and female enjoy gold jewelry or "bling"
other accessories chavs have include lighters, Windsor blue's, white ace or special brew 3 babies by different dads
they also have there own form of language including hand symbols and gestures though in reality most of this has been stolen from the hip hop and gangsta rap community
due to this it is also thought the whigger is closely related to the chav a figure of respect for all chavs is Jeremy kyle
I'm no chav I'm a OG yeah
brap brap brap
me benefit cheque ain't came though shit
chantelle get back here i ain't done note