A British colony's government walks into the Queen's office. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the Queen, "We have a really amazing act. You should let us govern ourselves."
The Queen says, "Sorry, I don't let colonies go. They're a little too cute."
The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to let us govern ourselves."
The Queen says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."
The father starts to decribe the act by saying "First I come out on stage with my naked daughter in my arms. Then my wife comes out naked carrying a unicycle. I take our daughter and stick The unicycle up her ass."

The shit starts to come off the wheel of my uniclycle, flying all over the stage and even on the first few rows of the audience." "That`s right" the father says. "Then I start to fuck my wife in the ass when my son comes out on stage with our dog". Then the son says "I start to make our dog`s dick hard by sucking on it. When it`s nice and big I let him fuck me up my ass." The daughter continues "I get off my cycle and start to deepthroat the post I just had up my butt"

Then says the father "We all piss on the floor mixing shit, jizz, pussyjuice and urine together which we lick up, cleaning every speck. When it`s all clean we stand up, hold hands, smile and take a bow".
For the longest time, Queen just sits in silence. Finally, she manages, "That's a hell of a government. What do you call it?"

And the father says, "Canada!"
And thats how Canada's History came to be
by Chief413 February 04, 2010
A sex act between three or more males and a female. It can only be performed properly behind a Tim Hortons.

The woman sits in an empty kiddie pool dressed as a lumberjack and the men surround and pour maple syrup over her while removing her clothing using only hockey sticks.

After the woman is nude, the men position themselves such that no less than two penises are in her anus, which is lubricated with maple syrup. The third man forces Canadian bacon down her throat. Any additional men would take turns with the anal sex.

After several sticky minutes of butt loving and "bacon" then men circle the pool and urinate while being fellated.

When the men each about to ejaculate, they take turns dumping their loads in her syrupy anus and then make a line to suck the sweet shit-cum out and pass it to each other mouth to mouth all the way down the line and then to the woman, who gargles it to the tune of the Canadian national anthem then swallows.

If a moose is available it is also fellated by the woman.
Canada's History is a part of a typical day in Quebec.
by CHansen February 04, 2010
the sexual act of pouring maple syrup on ones genitals while sticking moose antlers in your ass and urethra while singing Oh Canada
yesterday joe and i canada's history'd all night long with this homeless man
by mtw800 February 04, 2010
When a man takes his hand and sticks it up a moose's asshole all the way to the elbow while his Courtney (see definition of Courtney) licks the Moose's testicles and fingers the guys ass. Then the man takes a handful of moose shit and smears it on the Courtney's face and sticks his penis in the moose until he blows he is close to cumming then blows his load over the Courtney then they both suck the moose off until the animal blows its load all over the Courtney.
I was reading about Canada's History in the Beaver today and am not sure where I could find a Courtney willing to get a moose testicle in the mouth.
by Cobi_39 February 04, 2010
When a man sticks his member into a woman's anus, pulls the excrement out with a moose antler (using maple syrup as a lubricant) and pours the mixture out into the Stanley Cup, creating a soup that is immediately imbibed by both parties (before it gets cold like B.C.)
Sherill and I finally took it to the next level. Canada's history was performed all over the Marriott Inn Vancouver
by Colbert_Eh? February 04, 2010
a) A reverse Halifax Fudge Burger, except, after insertion, you pull out, and turn it into a Sloppy Dog Sled, then you grab an entire bottle of maple syrup, and squirt both the syrup and your semen into her hair.

b)The history of the large country tot he North of the United States.
I just read her all of Canada's History, if you know what I'm saying.
by Dirty Mounty February 04, 2010
A sex act so absurd and inappropriate that those even mentioning have been arrested for pedophilia, lewd behavior, and public indecency.

Not to be confused with Canada's Hysterectomy, otherwise know as the mere sight of a Canadian man.
This girl was so indecent that she even performed Canada's History with him.
by xythadar February 04, 2010

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