The old tale goes like this:
Jesus was walking down a road when he came upon a man from Calabria. He asked the man, "Where are you going?", and the man replied "God or no God, I go to Calabria". So Jesus turned him to stone for a day.
The next day Jesus came back, restored the man to his original form and asked the same question, "Where are you going?", and the man replied "God or no God, I go to Calabria". So Jesus turned him to stone for a week.
This went on for a month, a year, 5 years, 10 and then 20 years, all with the same results. Finally Jesus threw his hands in the air and said, "There is no gourd thicker than the skull of a Calabrese" and he allowed him to complete his journey.
1: Tu sei siciliana
2: no no Sono calabrese
Person 2: She's ugly
Calabrese: BITCH THE FUCK YOU JUST SAY?!?!? *with machine gun*
*Person 1 and 2 run off*