Dane Cook's description of bad teeth describes British teeth very well:
"If a girl opens her lips and its all *Flingk FlIngK FliNgK FlinGk* if its like a booby trap, I don't like it when you open your mouth and its a battle of epic proportions goin on, and your teeth are all screamin' at each other in there. "I'm a molar, Wisdom tooth! Get the fuck outta my gums. Hi I'm a buck tooth and like to be outside past the lips. I enjoy a nice sea breeze from time to time...Hi I'm the crazy yellow toof that looks like corn. Don't brush me.Don't brush me. I have an image to uphold, don't brush me, I'm yellow."
Synonyms: Picket Fence, Mouth of Horrors