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11.
The phrase Blue Screen of Death has its origins in the maritime trade, particularly buccaneer lore of the sixteenth century. When a ship is sunk, all that is left is the morbidly still ocean, glistening bright blue in the Caribbean sun. Thus, when one heads out to sea, with the intention of meeting another boat, and all one sees is the rolling blue ocean, one can sadly assume that that boat has sunk.

The phrase became absorbed into common language as a term referring to the feeling of empty hopelessness one experiences when faced with a vast expanse of watery oblivion. Staring out into Lake Windermere, the great poet William Bleak was sufficiently moved by the still blueness that he wrote his masterpiece "Songs of Death", eventually going on to kick-start the goth movement.

With the advent of air travel in the twentieth century, it became applicable to the sky, as well as the sea: many an early airman was deemed lost to the Blue Screen of Death (although quite a few of them simply turned out to have gotten slightly lost and landed in the wrong place). Over time the Blue Screen has become synonymous with loss, emptiness and to some, the Devil.

The association of the colour blue with death, watery or otherwise, is readily visible throughout modern civilisation. Household cleaners such as bleach are packaged in blue bottles, in memory of those who, when the product was new to the market, mistook it for cheap ouzo and passed away through dissolution of the digestive tract. When one sings "The Blues" one is reflecting on the brevity of life, and the oblivion that awaits in death. Cheese and onion crisps, known to be the foulest of all snack foods, often come packaged in blue to ward off the purchaser.

With this in mind, that the "Blue Screen of Death" is the most chilling and deadly entity in computer science is no surprise. They have been plaguing computer operators since someone had the bright idea of connecting a screen to a computer. This is one of the most puzzling phenomina in computing since during the 60's, 70's and 80's the Blue Screen of Death was able to manifest itself in full blueness on green and amber monochrome cathode, black and white, and two tone LCD screens

The Blue Screen of Death was slipped into the very core of the Windows operating system at its inception, by a malicious developer with a sick interest in pagan rites. It is rumoured that when one sees the Blue Screen of Death on a computer screen it wrenches a tiny part of your soul and binds it to the afflicted machine. Repeated exposure, legend has it, will eventually drain one's spirit, leaving a living corpse, pale and restless, existing without purpose and an unquenchable thirst for caffeine.

A recent evolution of the "Blue Screen of Death" feature in Windows Vista has serious side effects. Instead of simply displaying a "blue screen", the new variant displays random flashing colors in a superhypnobrainwave pattern, causing the user to have a seizure and die within 195 hours of continuous seizure. The seizures are extremely painful for the 195 hours, then the seizure-ee suddenly feels a jabbing pain in their lower upper thigh and dies. 96.3141592% of these seizures last for the full 195 hours. The colors of the screen randomly flash between red, green and blue and actually cause death, so this variant of the "Blue Screen" should instead be called an epileptic screen of red, green and blue death, but Microsoft have decided to make the feature part of their new family of software - creating "Windows Live Screen of Death Beta".

The blue screen of death has had many social consequences. The Catholic Church has condemmed the blue screen of death for promoting a "culture of death". Instead, the church favors the "Ooops" kernel messages generated by linux. The phrase "Ooops" is a sacred part of Roman Catholic tradition, as it is the sound an Irish women makes when she realizes that the rythem method of birth control doesn't work.

A recent study conducted by an up and coming university Massachusetts Institute of Technology, located in Chicago, has managed to determine the Blue Screen of Death as cause of other incidents. It was an extensive study, conducted for over 30 years by a group of under-fed under-grad students.

Incidents: broken computer equipment; violent crime and suicide increase; loss of data and home made movies; wet floor and terrified expression on the face of a person that used the computer last; mysterious deaths of occupants in high-tech residences; increase in drugs abuse; and many more.

It is also possible to see a yellow screen of death, if you are colour-blind. While the BSOD has been known to cause many many heartattacks, it has also been known to cause coniptions as well as the ability to gain super human strength and shoot eye beams into your computer monitor. Please, do not have a heart attack if it happens to you.
“Damn You Bill Gates.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Blue screen of death
by kodiac1 July 05, 2006
 
8.
Windows NT crashed.
I am the blue screen of death.
No one hears your screams.
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
by hayw00d February 16, 2005
 
9.
BSOD, a point in time (almost hourly) where windows finds an error in a patch of memory. "reference error at x0fffffx0ff112" the number jibberish is in hex, like you could find that specific memory point anyway.
I was sitting enjoying my kiddie porn, when suddenly my web page wouldnt load! i clicked furiously on the link, but to my dismay a blue screen popped up and...

(he said no more the awe of the BSOD had him switch to linux immediatly)
by ViRuS September 06, 2003
 
10.
1. An error message that appears on the Microsoft Windows 9.x platform. It may appear because of hardware problems, driver issues, viruses, a problem with Windows, overclocked processor or other reasons.

2. An error message that appears on the Micrsoft Windows NT/2000/XP platform due driver or hardware problems. It is also referred to as a "STOP Error" because the word "STOP" is displayed at the top of the screen. The NT/2000/XP blue screen of death usually provides more detailed information than the Win 9.x blue screen of death.
1. Bad RAM has been known to cause the blue screen of death on Windows 9.x computers.

2. A driver problem may cause Windows NT/2000/XP to display a blue screen of death containing a physical memory dump.
by Gary Destruction June 10, 2003
 
12.
Bill Gates you are one sick sick man, to create something this horrible, and why does it have to be blue why can't it be green or pink or purple.
Im stitting in the computer lab and suddenly the computers one by one start to blue until all the computers around me are blue then I say to myself "oooh shit, wait until I save my work,....NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"
-Bastard-
by Unreal Spatula March 04, 2005
 
13.
Microsoft's most interactive program which enables you to watch your computer slowly be eaten away by the crap like style of the so called WINDOWS franchise. If you want to get this program, it's quite easy really, free of charge. Just open Internet many times and copy and paste random vids on to the internet address bar and load it. It will then show you some random coded jargon that Bill Gates used to manipulate his users, of which they copy the so called Error Code and try to troubleshoot the system. Here are some steps to troubleshoot the system or BSOD.

1. Shoot the goddamn computer for god's sake.
2. Get a mac
3. Use linux
4. There really isn't anything else you can do except keep the system and watch it dump your files "MORE JARGON"
The Blue screen of death literally will kill you on impact.
Mommy look at my windoze, its blue screen of death. "Mommy and the kid were never seen again," Says bill gates.
by Adam E. and Alex Y. May 01, 2008
 
14.
An 600 x 800, blue message screen generated by a fatal error on a computer using a version of Windows prior to Windows 2000. This screen also closes the program you are using and makes you automatically lose all your unsaved data.
"I just got a blue screen of death and lost all my hard work! AAAAHHH!"
by star8706 February 01, 2003