FUCK ME BABY
PUT THAT THING IN MINE LIKE THE BIRDS AND THE BEES
Explaining to children about sex.
: Daddy, how are babies made?
: Daddy plants a seed in mummys' tummy
: Does she swallow the seed?
: Only if she wants a new dress
: What is a masturbation?
: That's a mouthfull for someone of your age
: No, a mouthfulls a blow job.
According to tradition, the birds and the bees is a metaphorical story sometimes told to children in an attempt to explain the mechanics and consequence of sexual intercourse. According to that story the birds are like men and the bees like women: Birds are free to fly wherever they like, but bees are enslaved to a single queen their entire life and their whole life is dedicated to keeping her alive. Bees pollinate flowers, birds spread the seed, men impregnate eggs, women give birth. Sex is key for survival of both.
let me tell you 'bout the birds and the bees
1)The talk that a parent (usually a mother) gives her daughter/son on the night of their first date, containing safe sex, or abstinence. The whole point of the 'birds and bees' is to convince you NOT
to have sex.
2)The most annoying talk in the world.
1) Mom- Honey, we need to talk.
Daughter- Mom, I DON'T want the 'birds and the bees' talk.
Mom- But you need to know not to have sex. You could get pregnant and die
Daughter- We're JUST going to a friend's house for a small get-together.
Mom- Are there going to be a lot of boys there?
Daughter- No Mom, it's a nun club.
Typical parents' attempt to describe sex to their kids
OK, son, it's time to talk about the birds and the bees...