look up any word, like crust punk:
 
1.
A nickname or term for a person who can cause havoc and is inherently clumsy and posses little logic or common sense. A Bilko will be the most accident prone person you are ever likely to meet and extreme caution should be used when a Bilko is in the vacinity.

The most famous and some say original Bilko is 'Bilko', aka Zoid and Mr Neil, and is native to Northern France, Belgium and South East England. It is unclear as to why it moves location on a near daily basis, one theory is it's need for alcohol, food and to give others a break from his catastrophic tendancies.

A Bilko is also a formidable eater of pies, kebabs and curry with peshwari naan bread, although nothing hotter than a Madras. It has been rumoured that when it's questioned, it will reply 'I am not the Zoid you are looking for' which is taken loosely from Star Wars.

WARNING: for your personal safety, do not approach, contact or get stuck in the same room as a Bilko.
Suebo: 'Who on earth has left this trail of total destruction and half eaten peshwari naan bread?'

Tarquin: 'That would have been Bilko, we should count ourselves lucky we missed it.

Suebo: 'Yeah, true dat bro, true dat, we may have been injured or even eaten.'
by Lover of Two Chairs April 11, 2011
 
2.
Southern Ontario slang for a hand job.
St. Catharines is full of places where you can get full-on bilko.
by TrolleyCrash November 14, 2005