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1.
As much fun as it sounds, beer poop is actually a remedy for the clogged anus that sometimes befalls certain cheese-ridden individuals. It is similar to an enema, though it employs the technology of carbonation.

To perform the beer poop on a sickly individual:
1) Bend that sucker over and drop their pants.
2) Open a long neck beer and shake it up with your thumb atop the bottle.
3) Let the thumb go and immediately insert the neck of the beer into the sick individual's anus.
4) Try to catch the quickly exiting turds for bonus points.

Bonus points if your beer poop is performed by Ron Jeremy, and/or you host videos of beer pooping on the network servers of Duke University.
Man, all that Bojangles and Poppycock left me hurting for a beer poop.

Let's go watch beerpoop.avi in Guenther's room.