During sex one must act the whole time like they are in an episode of Baywatch. Things to do in order to be effective at this include -

* Running in slow-mo to the bed
* Actually fucking in slow mo
* Stopping midsex for a muscle posedown with a mirror
* Demanding to be refered to as "The Hoff" during sex
* Oiling oneself before and after sex, and if possible during.
* Sticking your dick far up her ass, claiming you are probing for any nuclear devices if she complains.
* Come on her face, say its good sunblock and then highlight the dangers of skin cancer