Sorry aussie folks, but australia was formed when a bunch of British convicts were shipped there and started to populate. So in reality, your all descendants of criminals. :D
Unsuspecting tourist: Here, can you hold my camera please?

Australian Criminal: Sure thing! (Runs for the hills)

by Bubs_13 October 23, 2007
The country everyone wants to get out of. No reason for leaving is required as everyone is thinking the EXACT same thing. In fact.. any excuse will do in order to immigrate to a more worthwhile country.
Person 1: I really want to get out of Australia!

Person 2: Doesn't everyone, doesn't everyone?
by Times Tables Are Fun September 19, 2008
Also know as Peasantville.
An island in the southern hemisphere inhabited by former convicts from Britain and well as peasants from many countries other than England.
This incredible mix created a society obsessed with their own importance, beer and sport.
An average level of education in Australia is about second to third grade. For example, English grammar is not taught in this English speaking country. An apostrophe followed by an S, is considered to be plural. General knowledge of world's issues is zero.
The official flag of Australia is a dark blue singlet (affectionally called a "wife beater").
Australian national anthem is short and easy to learn: "Ozzie, ozzie, ozzie, oi, oi, oi". In actual fact the anthem did have a second verse, but it was hard to remember and was scraped by the parliament in 1996.
The melody of the anthem is non-existent. The correct way to sing it is to do so after consuming several cans of a pesticide (aka local beer).

Favourite pastimes of Australians include, but are not limited to:
Getting drunk at work, getting drunk after work, getting drunk instead of work, getting drunk at football, getting drunk at football, getting drunk at football, talking about mortgage rates, getting drunk at football.

Australians love the "brown land of ours". They express their love by throwing rubbish out of their car windows and going on holidays to Bali, where the beer is cheaper.

They dislike all other countries and feel superior to any other nation in the world, and yet they think American and buy Chinese.

Australia has a rich culture, which includes horse racing and two codes of football; Rugby and Australian Rules Football. The latter is an immensely popular game (in the state of Victoria that is) and according to Victorians it should replace all other sports in the world (with the exception of horse racing).

Australians per capita are the highest gambling peoples in the world.
Victorians hold the record in being the highest polluters per capita in the world.

The Australian dream is to possess a crap looking, badly build house (6 to an acre) and one day become the 51 state of the USA.
Australia? Where's that?
by 99% aussie March 19, 2009
A great country ''down under'' which is sadly and quite rapidly being taken over by the chinese,japanese,korenese and many other f---ingese countries!
Too much mulitcuturalism I say.
Oh and it's ok we're all derived from convicts mainly and some settlers but we'll only steal a few goodies for our sheilas back in the barns yeh?
Aussie Bloke - Goodaye mate ow' ya goin?!
American Tourist - whatcha'll saying bout ma momma?!?!?!? %@%##%^#$^#$ australian!!!!
Aussie Bloke - Oi look ay kangaroo over there mayte!!
-American Dude Looks-
Aussie Bloke -Yoink!- steals the old wallet n camera!
American Dude - I missed it man, bummerrrr!!
Aussie - ah well mayte im off goodby'!
American - Cya ya later man!! Holl;a back ya'll!!
by Aussie Joe February 06, 2007
A country that loves New Zealand. Seriously. As opposed to this idea that many Aussies hate New Zealand well let's just say that a couple of years ago a certain young woman went to Bali for a holiday and what a fine time she's having too. (*not*) Leave it at that shall we? Obviously the inverse doesn't apply if the two nations are co-operating with each other in Solomons Tonga, Timor.. And two seperate countries they will remain. A majority of people in either nation weren't too keen on the idea in 1901 and aren't now. So if that lass with the sheep up her arse could try and realise that things would be good.
Underneath the squabbling Australia and New Zealand really do love each other.
by Paul Ward November 18, 2006
A Complete shithole, full of redneck-jock-ignoramus-shithead-morons who have no desire for even the most basic levels of intellegence. I know, i live here. URGH!!!
Me: Kevin Rudd And Brendan nelson Are both conservative shitheads who whitewash us with capitalist lies.

Average Australian: Politics Are for faggets, and Oz Is Da Best. Oi Oi Oi. I hate people who are different from me and my white-middle class existance.

Me: Go die you ignorant Homophobe-Racist-sexist-nationalist mega-xenophobe douche
Known on the show "Starter Wife" they call Australia the vagina. If you don't believe me, watch the show.
Guy: Wanna get down an' dirty?
Girl: Excuse me, my Australia is closed for the season.
by Screamo_Poptart August 15, 2007

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