Two definitions are for Atheist:
1. A Death metal band formed and from Florida.
2. A person, who rejects the necessity for omnipotent beings (gods, I assume).
1."Atheist made they're first great performance in 1989".

2.A:"Once I met an atheist, who isn't going to put up with god ruling our lives"

B:"Meh, theism is theism. This side believes in god(s) and the other side doesn't".
by Möszick February 19, 2013
a person who needs to actually read the most amazing book, the bible. And until then just needs to shut up.
Atheist: God says that he made the world in 17 minutes

Smart person: Have you even read the bible.

Atheist: Well umm...I read the front title...

Smart person: Until you read it shut up
by aitbcitw November 21, 2011
Intelligent person who realizes that the idea of God is PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE. Furthermore, the Bible is full of paradoxes: If God is all-powerful, can he create a rock he can't lift? Also, the Bible states that the worlds is 6,000 years old. However, it's actually millions of years old. So how does that work out?
Then there's the fact that God let 9/11 happen. And the Holocaust. And a bunch of other horrible things that never should have happened. You say that God works in mysterious ways? I say that's a pretty poor excuse, and that whatever positive effects 9/11 had, I'm sure God; being "all-powerful" (although we've already established that that's impossible) should be able to think of another way to get the effects to happen without killing 3,000 people. So God either doesn't exist, or is a huge douchebag. By the way, if he DOES exist, why the hell hasn't he blasted me to smithereens for calling him a douchebag like I just did? Also, why'd he create atheists? Because he works in mysterious ways? Nope, we've already debunked that. (Continued in Example)
Also, if God created all life at the beginning of Creation...why do fossils for certain creatures date back longer than others? And where's the concrete evidence that anything in the Bible ever happened? Also, it's impossible to walk on water. Or turn water into wine. Plus you can't come back from the dead. Snakes don't talk. Never have. A virgin can't get pregnant, nobody is immortal, and waters can't be parted. Last but not least, ever notice how similar the stories and powers of God are to Greek mythology? Or Roman? Plus Egyptian, Mayan, Aztec, Native get the point. Anyways, that's an atheist.
by sg9461 February 06, 2011
Someone smart enough to realize that not only is there no god, but that the 'why' question is completely irrelevant. It is rather based on the unfalsifiable assumption that because we as humans can plan and scheme, then so the rest of the universe must also have a 'prime mover' who planned and schemed this world as well (even though to say that there is prime mover would mean that one would need to go into infinite regress). This world view is closely related to the pre-Copernican view that the earth was the center of the universe.
Theist: Look Atheist, I don't care how many facts and figures you throw at me, you still cannot tell me how science can answer the "why?" question.

Atheist: What is the "why?" question?

Theist: Well duh! it's only the most important question in the world! It's about why we are here!

Atheist: Why does that matter?

Theist: Because, it would tell us our purpose in life!

Atheist: Why does that matter?

Theist: Because, why would you live in a world where there is no purpose to what you do? There needs to be something to guide us!

Atheist: So are you saying that instead of figuring that out on your own, you want someone or some"thing" else to tell you what your life is about?

Theist: NO.....I just don't think that anyone would want to live in a world with no purpose

Atheist: Listen Theist, I'm gonna go and have sex with your mom. I'll let you know if I find the answer to that when I get back okay?
by thequalifier October 04, 2010
A person who does not believe in god, not related to satanists, muslims, or anyone else christianity hates. Contrary to popular opinion, atheists are not self obsessing narcissists, but are just people who find the idea that by doing certain deeds (going to Church or blowing yourself up) will get you into a magical place where you live in paradise for all eternity
Atheist: "Hey man what's up?"
Religious zealot (not to be confused with normal religious person): "Screw you man, I'll see you in hell, oh wait, no I won't, I'll be in heaven pissing on you."
Atheist: okay....
by AtheistsdoyelJesuswhenstruck June 13, 2010
Someone who has no religion.

Usually someone who bases his or her life on reason and evidence.
I contend that we are both atheist. I just belive in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours. (based on Richard Dawkins)
by schumpeter June 07, 2010
When they die, they become the ground... then in that ground grows a tree, which is then cut down by a big sweaty man named bubba, and then they are printed into bibles.

They also believe that if you're Christian (or a member of any other religion), you are always depressed and think that you keep a list of things you can't do on your fridge, they hate Church, don't know that you can sleep in on a Sunday, and are all homophobics. TheAmazingAtheist is their Jesus.
Person One: *Sneezes*
Atheist: When you die nothing happens!
by Commander FLuffee June 25, 2010

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