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1.
Slang for marijuana.
"Blowin' on asparagus; The realest shit I ever smoked" - Young Jeezy, "Put On"
by bonkeykong May 13, 2008
 
2.
A random vegitable. Tasty. Makes pee smell weird.

Also used as asparagusarific. Asparagusarific is a term saying that something is as good as asparagus.
"Asparagus"
"That stuff is just asparagusarific"
by Yattasparagus28 September 14, 2003
 
3.
Someone who always seems to smell extremely bad and does not even try to clean themself. No matter what time you see this person, they smell awful.
Jordan- (takes off football pads)

Team- Jordan you're an asparagus

Jordan- Shut up fools I smell fresh

Team- You smell awful you asparagus
by Thomas Selser December 10, 2013
 
4.
1: Delicious Vegetable that should not in any case be shoved up one's genitalia and then feed it to your dog.

2: Abigails Favourite Veggi
Man 1: Hey Did you Hear Abigail put a asparagus in her vag
Man 2 :EWWWW Thats just nastay
by BaileyMclellan6969 April 22, 2011
 
5.
The act of being absent
"My conscience is asparagus today"
by Woopdeedoo! May 12, 2012
 
6.
a term used to describe a hella gross penis that is skinny and has a greenish tint to it.
elaine-omg becky did you see that asparagus?!
becky-omg yeah i could fit like 69 of them in my mouth
elaine-do you think i could get an STD from giving him head?
becky-you'll never know unless you find out
elaine-thx for the advice bae. luv u
by cutiepatootiewithanicebooty June 15, 2014
 
7.
slang for the "man root"... delicious with melted butter (not too hot...at least not the butter)
Some asparagus is always in season...
by stimme May 16, 2006