*Rice, rice, and more rice
*Nothing but water
*Education > life itself
*A - the only acceptable grade
B - they will scream and hit you
C - they will seriously abuse you and hurt you bad
D or lower - kicked out or threatened to death
*They don't care for your looks, all they want is short hair
*Will not let you go out late
*9 PM - 10 PM bedtime
*They will make you study no matter what
All in all, they are just trying to protect and raise you, believe it or not. Don't blame the parents, blame the way they were raised. I'm Asian and I remained sane due to pure determination. The only thing you can do is put up with it. You can't change them, it's just the way it is. You'll just have to see that they want you to be successful. While it might be cruel, it's what they believe is the best way to make you a successful person. You will want to hate them a lot, but keep your head up high and you'll make it.
Dad: GO STUDY NOW!!!
Me: Wait, what did I do?
Dad: GO OR GET OUT!!!
Me: Alright, I'll go study.
Dad: DON'T TALK BACK!!!
Mom: GO GET A HAIRCUT!!!
Me: What? Why? It's not that long
Mom: DON'T TALK BACK TO ME!!!
*drags you off to get a bowl cut or a buzz cut
1)We DO NOT get allowance
2)We DO NOT get to stay up till past 10pm supposivly due to affecting our grades
3)The only thing that our parents make for dinner is RICE AND FISH, RICE AND FRIED CHICKEN, RICE SOUP FRIED FISH, RICE MONGO FISH.
4)If you get below a B then they take something you love or like to do away from you until you get back up in next semester
5)THEY HIT US, mom bitch slaps, Dad throws you against wall or gets the belt and whips you until you start crying.
6)They CONTROL your life.. Your personality, what you believe in, your appearance.. and if you refuse what they tell you to do, they will take your computer away and ruin MY FUCKIN GAMING CAREER CAS IM ONLY ALLOWED 6 HOURS A DAY AND they didnt let me go to Dallas Texas which was $400 for plane that i was able to pay for myself that cud of ended up with 7 grand and it was during the summer break FFS >_< ...... I wanted to be a pro gamer, or a garbage man, not a fuckin doctor!! im too lazy and dumb to be a doctor so stop telling me i have to be a godamn doctor.. I WISH I HAD WHITE PARENTS GODAMIT!!
7)You have basicaly have to do all the chores in the house..
word of advice, do not get ur driving license until you move out of your asian parents house, or it will be a "Go to the supermarket and get ricebags license"
Me: No! its my hair stop telling me what i have to look like.
Asshole dad: "If you dont shave ur head then im taking away the computer until u get ur haircut"
Me: Aw shit WTF..
*Gets a 12 year old haircut*
Asian parents are like living in thier generation planting seeds in the rice farms
1. Not letting their kids play real sport, like rugby union, claming that it will affect their studies and it's too dangerous. Eventually, they'll let you play... but you gotta wait forever.
2. If you don't get good grades, you're screwed. They'll hit you and kill you until you promise to study harder for the next exam.
3. They don't care about your physical health and social life, they just care about your studies.
4. They want you to be a doctor/dentist. No way...
5. They want the best school for you... no matter if it's 2 hours away.
6. You got all A's and just one F in your report card. They'll kill you and belt you for that F.
7. Your parents see a girl hug you at the age of 16. They belt you because the girl hugged you.
8. You play games for over one hour. Asian parents will kill you for it.
9. Got into a sporting gala day? Asian parents wont let you go because they're worried about you missing out on a day of school. Gosh damn, it's only ONE DAY!
10. Every evening it's rice, rice, rice and more rice.
11. "Don't watch MTV, study! You're wasting your time on watching uselsss music videos!" says Asian parents.
These are just 11 of thousands of wrong things that Asian parents do to you. From this, it is sensible to infer that a majority of Asian parents are just dickwads.
I got a Satisfactory in my report... I'm dead. - Typical Asian kid dictated by Asian parents
Fuck! I'm into summer school, when did I even register? - Asian kid
1. THEY ARE OBSESSIVE ABOUT YOUR GRADES. They want you to go to a good college like a UC or Harvard and stuff and get tons of scholarships and be rich lawyer or doctor. Here are grade when it comes to asian parents:
A - Asian standard, the only acceptable grade.
B - Bad
C - Catastrophe
D - Death
F - F***'d
Tip- DO NOT tell them you have a bad grade when they are in the kitchen! Most of my fellow asians in my town keep shoes near the kitchen area, if you tell an asian parent you bad grade in the kitchen you could get shoes thrown at you, you could get maimed by utensils and if they are near the knifes you are just plain screwed.
2.THEY ARE CONTROLLING.
Who you are, what you wear, what you do- it's all up to them
3. THEY THINK ANYTHING YOU DO ASIDE FORM STUDYING IS A WASTE OF TIME.
4. THEY ARE ABUSIVE.
It's simple, you don't meet up to their standards they have no problem in getting rid of you.
5. Rice. And fish.
6. If you have many possessions they will take them away. If you don't they will just take away your dignity.
Friend who got an A and doesn't have Asian Parents: Listen! You can switch tests with me! It's a scantron! They will never know!
Asian kid: We can't, they will find out somehow! I'm screwed either way!
2) They want you to study..all day every DAY! They have some vision that kids will just decide to study all day in the summer for fun after they had to put up an entire school year of it!
3) They CONTROL your life, and most asians don't realize this until they read this. Asian parents control what you wear, who you hang out with, if you can do something, if u can't, what you look like; YOUR HAIRCUT?
Actual conversation between and mom and asian boy.
Mom: You need haircut, you look like girl.
Boy: But I like my hair mom!
Mom: No you need now1@@!@!@!@!! - drags boy to haircut salon -
4) They get ticked off really easy, Let me give you an example (PROVEN)
Girl: it's not like I want to spend all day studying
Dad: this is for your OWN GOOD, this wastes everybody's time, it doesn't help us!@!@
Girl: But I just --(cut off)
Dad: 2!#@!#@#@!#@!@!@$#$#%#235%@ STOP COMPLAINING2!@!@ YOU ARE USELESS, YOU KNOW I COULD SEND YOU OFF TO A PUBLIC SCHOOL AND YOU CAN BE NO ONE21@!@!@!@!@!@!!@!#!@#$@!$!#$@#%$%$^%$^%@!#!@!#!@#@!$
5) Their grade system
A- only thing acceptable
C- seriously kid, you better runaway now!
6) You can only be a doctor, or a dentist
7) They think anything besides studying is a waste of time (PROVEN)
8) You can only do swimming, or tennis as a sport because everything else is too 'dangerous'
9) Every evening, it's rice, rice, and more rice, when was the last time I had a biscuit or somethin? I like biscuits :/
10) They think every word is a bad word, when really it's just a word you might say as you grow up!
Stupid, butt, butthole, shut up,
You know, the things you might call your older brother if you're really mad at him. (not cussing though)
11) BONUS: IF you cry, they don't care, they don't try to understand you feelings, they don't care, they just think everyone was brought up in China or Vietnam like them and love to study, And if you have a suck-up perfect brother, he likes to give speeches that make sense but make you sound retarded and stupid and like you don't know what you're talking about.
Asshole dad: YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY NOW! YOU HAIR TOO LONG! SO UGLY!
Me: Why can't I look the way I want?
Dad: YOU LOOK LIKE GIRL! DO YOU WANT PEOPLE THINK YOU GIRL?!!?!??!?!?!
Me: How is 3 inch long hair girly?
Dad: NO MATTER WHAT, YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY! OR I TAKE YOU LAPTOP AWAY!
Me: ... *gets a lopsided haircut that makes me look like a fucking nerd. Asian parents fail. *
Faghead dad: Did you do your homework today?
Dad: did you do your homework today?
Dad: did you do your homework today?
Dad: WHY YOU YELL? YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO YELL AT ME!
Me: Well obviously you couldn't hear me so I had to yell
Dad: SHUT UP!!!
Dad: YOU ARE THE STUPIDEST KID EVER. *beats*
This is a true story. I was in 4th grade, and my mom was trying to teach me how to add fractions. I didn't get it at the time, and here's what happened:
Mom: Do #1
Me: *does it, gets it wrong*
Mom: WRONG! HOW YOU FORGET? DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR!
Me: I'm trying!
Mom: WATCH!!! *does problem, expects me to magically know how to do it* Now do #2
Me: *still doesn't get it, gets it wrong*
Mom: STUPID! DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR! *bitch slaps*
Me: *sobbing* I don't know how!
Mom: *angrily does the problem, and breaks the pencil in the middle* SHARPEN IT!
Mom: Now do #3!
Me: *gets it wrong. How does she expect me to learn this stuff in a day as a 4th grader?*
Mom: YOU ARE THE MOST STUPIDEST KID IN THE WORLD! *goes in a bitch slapping and punching frenzy*
Me: *ends up with lots of bruises*
Fucktard dad: *watching '24' with me* This is the stupidest show ever. All it does is label chinese people as bad guys
Me: ... There are american terrorists too...
Dad: This is the most unrealistic stuff ever. Bullshit. How does jack survive everything?
Me: How come martial artists in chinese movies can fly? Unrealistic much?
Dad: Shut up
Unfortunately, many new asian parents that end up in America will do the same to their kids. But there is light at the end of the tunnel. The new generation of asian americans will never treat their kids the same... so therefore the chain will be broken. We will know better, listen to our kids, trust them, and be their guide rather than their dictator. There is hope for the next generation of american parents out there...
Mom: I am your mother, you HAVE to listen to me. If I say jump you ask 'how high'
Dad: Sometimes will beat you with a whip. (BTW, kids if this happens to you call the cops please. It's called child abuse)
Both Parents: So and so got into Harvard, why didn't you get into Harvard? You're so stupid... studying on how to become a technician? What???? OMG, MY SON/DAUGHTER IS A FCKEN FAILURE.
Mom talking to her 10 year old: Your sister got into a good school, has a good job, married a doctor, has 2 kids... what do you do huh?? Sit at home playing video games all day?
Dad: Son, when you grow up you have to be better than everyone else. it's not enough that you succeed, everyone else must fail.
1. They still enforce a FUCKING BED TIME for their children, even if they are in high school.
2. They almost never give their children money.
3. Whenever their kid gets a gift or money from someone else, the parents usually gives them to someone else.
4. The only hairstyles allowed for their children are bowl cut and buzz cut.
5. They force their children to do work and chores all day when they just watch asian movie series all day long.
6. The mom often bitch slaps her child when the child did something wrong" ie. spilled a couple of drops of milk on the floor. The dad punches/whacks/shoves intowall until the child starts crying for similar "offenses".
7. Anything lower than an A is considered a failure. If an asian child gets a B or something, he/she expects a beating at home.
8. There is no such thing as a good grade in an asian home.
9. Typical home made asian cuisine is rice, fish, chicken, and vegetables. Except that they are all poorly cooked and taste worse than partially digested milk.
10. If a male asian teenager's parents see him so much as TALKING with a girl, they will accuse him of having sex with her even if he was merely asking her for something like homework.
11. Asian parents often treat their children like they are 5 years old and claim that they do so because they "care" about their children.
12. They usually speak in Engrish.
1. Dad can I go watch a movie with my friend? It's saturday.
No! It already 10:30! Get to bed NOW!!!
2. Mom can I have $2 for lunch today?
No go earning it yourself.
3. Mom why did you give my gift card away to some random asian dude?
Because you don't are needing it.
4. Dad: I give you haircut now!
Kid: But my hair isn't even long.
Dad: I don't care! You look like girl! Come over here before I take away you TV and compute privalwoeigb *privaleges*awoiwebgio(word to complicated to process)
5. Dad can I go outside for a while? I just finished a whole SAT.
No! Go do another!
6. Self explanatory
7. Kid: Oh fuck I just got an 88 on my math test.
Friend: You're fucked when you get home...
8. Mom can I go hang out with my friends I just got a 100 on my math test!
Why you no get extra credit? Stay home and study so you get extra credit next test.
9. Self explanatory
10. Mom: Who you talking to on phone?
Mom: Let me listen *snatches phone*
Mom: *in phone* HARRO? WHO THIS?
Girl: Ummm... hi
Mom: *hangs up* Why you talk with girl? You get in bed with her?
11. Dad can you please stop peaking into my room?
No. I have to make sure you no using drug or do illegal things.
Put some suntan rotion on you skin so you no get skin cansa!
You must show me compute history every day so i making sure you no looking at irregal web site!
Why you no get 100? When I little kiddie I arways get perfecting test score with extra credit addeding to score!
I hate you! You no never behaving, always thinking about play. Arr you thinks about are eat, sreep, game. Why cannot you act rike the perfected kid that I wanting you to be? You just an razy stupiding kid who cannotingedry act applopliatery and you justing never not no study!!!