The reason why American Football is called American Football is because it is mainly played in AMERICA. "Oh yeha, I'ma brit and american football is so ghey" Well guess what, YOUR COUNTRY DOSN'T EVEN PLAY IT, SO HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU JUDGE IT!? How many Americans do you see going to the cricket page and talking about how much they hate it? Hardly any, because we really don't watch or play cricket in america. How many americans go on the Rugby page and talk about how much they hate that? Again, hardly any although all those Ignorant europeans just seem to love to talk about how Football isn't as "hard" as Rugby. You know what? I've never seen a Rugby game, played it, or hardly know much about it, so I'm not going to spout of about how much I hate it like all the other ignorant europeans. You guys seriesly need to just 1.) Fuck off and start obsessing over you soccer, rugby, cricket shit rather than going on to Urban Dictionary so you can talk about how much you hate a sport your country does not even play or 2.) Actually watch/play/learn the damn game before you fucking judge!
Ignorant Person: American Football is full of fat people

American: Not True. Football players have been know to be able to lift over 300 lb. repeatidly, all that is muscle

Ignorant Person: Football contains no strategy

American: Not True, Football is the most strategic game on earth which is the reason dumbass Jocks never make it to the NFL

Ignorant Person: Soccer is the best sport because it's the most popular

American: Not true, Soccer is the most popular sport because any third-world country can play it becuase it only requires a ball and a net

Ignorant Person: Football is for pussys, Rugby Rules

American: Not True, although I have not seen a rugby game before, I know for a fact that football is more hard hitting because 1) In early football years with no pads, football deaths were extremely common and 2) Rugby deaths are not common

Ignorant Person: Football is a gay name for a game that you catch balls with you hands

American: Not True, early football (Which was a LOT like rugby) Players only ran with their feet. In an attempt to make the game more exciting they incorperated passing the ball. While I do admit that calling it football is stupid nowadays, what else would you call it, throwball? Runball? Crossbarball? Hitball? All those names suck.

Ignorant Person: Football is basterdized rugby

American: Not True, The games are VERY different from what I heard. Like in football you can pass the ball, in Rugby (I don't belive) you can't forword pass

Ignorant Person: Soccer pwns Americna Football

American: Soccer is far to flawed a system for it to be legitimitly compared to any other sport. The fact that this game contains no overtime, flawed whole points system, goal differentials and the sheer tedium of the sport makes it hands down the worst sport I ever saw. But that's just me.

Ignorant Person: Players are to stupid to know how to attack AND Defend

American: If I were to put offensive players in defence football would be a worthless sport to watch. It would consist of NO defence since players of defence are 10x as strong than players on offence (Excluding O-Linemen) It'd basicly be a game of pitch and catch, it'd be stupid and boring

So there you go, anseres to all your ignorant questions you europeans...
by Cards in 06 August 27, 2006
Pretty much the dumbest idea ever. For one thing, it's not even football! Football is what you idiotic american football players call "soccer"."Soccer" is REAL football! In your retarded football, you don't even use your feet! Unlike in REAL football! For another thing, take an awesome game that isn't for pussies, rugby: no pads, no stopping in between every play, no 5 hour games, and no stupid goal as big as the field itself! Take that awesome sport over seas to america, have some stupid lard-a's that do nothing but sit on their asses all day and watch TV, screw around with it, take REAL football's name cause they can't think of anything else cause they're failures at life, and you get american football: a "sport" for fatties that can't run for more then 15 seconds max.
american football player:You're a pussy.

ME:I play soccer and alley rugby, and your calling me the pussy! You're the pussy for playing american football. At least I can run for 90 min.'s straight without stopping every 2-15 seconds. And, all I wear pad-wise are tiny little shin guards, not a full body suit of new-age armor.

american football player:Football's a man's sport!

ME:My point exactly! You're all homosexuals! Just look at the way you touch each other!

american football player:We're not touching each other, we're hitting each other!

ME:Can you even feel that through those hundred-pound pads you're wearing. Plus, what is the point of the butt-protecters, just to make it harder for you're gay colleagues to get to it? I sure hope you guys are wearing condoms in those so called "dog piles". It would be horrible if a whole team died of AIDS, on second thought, do what ever you want.

american football player:well...ummm...well.......

ME:Oh, I'm sorry is your mouth guard in?

american football player:you....uhhhhh....you.......

ME:Yeah, that's what I thought.

ME:PEACE! Baby Gap.
by kellysucksbutirideitanyways February 11, 2008
American Football is the act of trying to touch other men while running around in tights. For some reason it is called football (it is not played with the foot), but thats just because we're stupid americans. Football requires no stamina because individual plays last up to a grueling 15 seconds. Football players are people who just want to try to be bi-curious by taking showers with each other, and slapping each others asses. Most americans are obsessed with this sport, and on game days, resort to drunken blabbering and screaming random things. All around, the only good part of football is the super bowl half time show.
Alex: American Football!!

Joey: Get Some!!!
by CoolRunningsManBobSled November 14, 2010
A pussied-out, dumbed down version of the sport rugby. Where you can be the biggest fatass in the world and still play. The players on the field are basically 250 lb pawns of the coach. Do the players do any real thinking besides remembering/memorizing which plays are which? Nope. Many asshugging football players like to bash soccer as a sport which requires no skill. Sadly this is not true, but it does require not being a fatass so its a good thing they don't play anyway.

Fact: fags play football
Sorry, I forgot how much skill and manliness there is in tackling each other for 5 hours. But of course not straight. Play only goes on for about 10 seconds at a time, at most, before a break so the fatasses can catch their breath.

American Football: for faggots, fatasses, and ugly fucks who generally lack even the remotest bits of athleticism.
by masrecio May 29, 2009
A man's sport that requires you to take a hit from a 300+ pound guy who runs a 4.4 40 yard dash. Everyone is swole as fuck, quick as fuck, and tough as shit. It is often critisized by dick riding foreigners because of the pads, but these cunt muffins fail to realize that these pads are required, or the player might get seriously fucked up. Most people realize that these bitches could never come close to being on the same level as these athletes. It is also one of the most entertaining sports in the world, unlike soccer, where a bunch of faggot-ass cock riders run around a kick a ball for 3 hours.
Soccer Player-"Soccer is the most popular sport in the world!"

American Football Player- "Shut the fuck up bitch, and suck this dick."

Soccer Player-"Yes sir.......

*Glaugh Blaugh Hauge*

Soccer Player-"Can I stop now sir?"

American Football Player- *Beats the shit out of the little ho*
by J-Bo That Chet March 03, 2010
I like American Football. It combines my two other favourite sports - cricket and rugby.

One thing does make me laugh though - the vicious "helmet to helmet" hit.

The only other place I've seen "helmet to helmet" action is in porn films, usually when one woman sucks two guy's cocks at the same time, causing them to go "helmet to helmet" in her mouth.
On field banter from a typical american football game:
"Hey TO, I'm linin' you up Helmet to Helmet"
"Be careful, I've only got a small mouth.."
by Turkurbentu April 07, 2009
classed as sport for some reason that isn't understood by anyone not american.

nobody knows the rules

it lasts for 4 hours or more but they only play for 10 minutes all together

players wear enough padding to survive a fall from a plane...

...except for on their legs. in which case very tight spandex seems to be all that is needed

most of the game is spent squatting and yelling until somebody gets frustrated and hurls the ball away

guy #1: i wanna play a sport but i'm to fat and lazy

guy #2: you know what, i could sign you up for american football if you want
by British and Proud December 28, 2008
Shite American "sport" for fat people to play and watch.

Physical fitness is not required as play stops every minute for a 5 minute break when the coaches play a basterdised version of physical chess. Not to mention the fact that the entire team gets changed round several times a game. Why? Because one player is to stupid to be able to know how to both attack AND defend!

Players wear pads and helmets because they are too feckin dumb to learn how to tackle properly (like in Rugby). Padding is like giveing a swimmer a boat.

I couldn't give a shit who or how big Ray Lewis is. If he took all that gay padding off and came across Jona Lomu or any of the New Zealand rugby squad he would know what a tackle is. The bigger they are the harder they fall. And if everyone keeps quoting his name because he's huge at 250lbs that's about the MINIMUM weight for an international rugby forward.

How many "football" players actually look like they've been in a game? They're all pretty boys who don't know what a good studing or stamping on feels like. They should be put at the bottom of rook to see what it feels like without padding.

To summarise - shit, slow, lazy game (sport is too generous a word) played by fat, unfit people and supported by self obssessed, ignorant, xenophobic yanks who believe that because it is their sport it is the best in the world and their players are the biggest and strongest.
"Do you wanna go play some sports"
"Nah i'll sit here and drink beer and eat nachos because i'm a fat lazy yank"
by Mike March 26, 2005

Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×