One of the greatest joys in life. Discovered (hopefully) when you go through puberty.
Andrew Dice Clay: Masturbation is king. Oh yeah, you know it, I know it so who are we bullshittin'?
by tenaciousd6936 August 20, 2006
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The Sole Purpose Of Myspace Pictures
I pulled up Jennies myspace and worked on my masturbation
by calikid January 28, 2007
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The act of pleasuring yourself. Self-sex, its like training for actual sex.Jacking off.

For a man stroking, rubbing, or even slapping the erect penis, for a women, rubbing the vagina with the two front fingers, or even lodging a penis shaped item such as a dildo in it.

There are terms such as;

Buff the Bananna
Spank the Frank
Stroke the one-eyed snake
beat the meat
Hold your sausage hostage
choke the chicken
Rub the Robin
Box the cock
Invade your pants with a five fingered army
Crank the Shank
Crown the King
Fondle the Fig
Jerk the Gerk
Tug the Tiger
Hand to Gland Combat.

As for women;

Vagina Dj
Taco Handshake
Play the Clitar
shuck the oyster
pressing the escape button
Tapping the keg
cleaning your fingers
the two finger tengo
ect
I just love the art of masturbation, it feels amzaing!
by The KockKing May 4, 2011
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Sex with someone I love.
- Woody Allen
Don't knock masturbation -- it's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen in Annie Hall, 1977
by mandingoe November 7, 2005
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a way to stay faithfulto your girl.

you do it cause: youre horny/bored/to kill time/just because its a habit.
masturbation is a great way to relieve horniness or just cause youre bored.
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Masturbation is perfectly natural. almost all guys do this:

Wait until your home alone or at night,
then go to your room and close the door.
take off all your clothes and grasp your penis in any or both hands. (make sure yiu have a box off kleenex near by)
then slowly begin to rub your penis until you get to a pace you like,
then rub faster at your choice of pace,
then rub really fast until you ejaculate which feels really awsome,
then wipe up the sperm (or in some cases, lick it up) this is best done while sitting in a chair or lying down, looking at porn or other sources of hornyness
well, im off do some masturbation, bye (dont listen to anyone who says its bad for you, its completely healthy.... just dont do it before you fuck a hoe or she'll be dissapointed
by some guy 500 March 21, 2009
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