Duder 1: "Check out this pic of my girl. Look at that guy kissing on her cheek. What the hell is that about?"

Duder 2: "I don't know man, but it looks like that's her jealousy pic."

Duder 1: "Fuck you I'm not jealous. That bitch better have a good explanation for this."

Duder 1: "Whoa dude look at that big lesbian work that punching bag."

Duder 2: "Yeah man she's totally a dyke tyson."

Duder 1: "Dude don't you remember? You thought that girl was hot in 9th grade, but she had really hairy arms."

Duder 2: "What? Are you sure?"

Duder 1: "Yea dude, that's why you backed off."

Duder 2: "Shit you're right. Damn your elephant memory."

Duder 1: "How was your first time?"

Duder 2: "Oh man it was cool. I was totally relex. I wasn't nervous at all."

Duder 1: "You're my idol dude."

Duder: "Awwww fuck yeaaaahhhh!!! Take that girl!"

Chica: "Oh!" (swallows) "Whoa.... that tasted like..... raw eggs....."

Duder: "You ok? You look a little cum sick girl."

Chica: (throws up all over the place)

Duder: "Fucking nasty! Peace bitch, don't call me ever again."

Duder 1: "So how was it with that asian girl last night?"

Duder 2: "Oh dude she had the stretchiest meat curtains I've ever seen. My face was all up in there for like an hour. I was so flap happy."

Duder 1: "You one sick mother, doggy."

Duder 1: "Yo man watch out there's a poon typhoon comin'!"

Duder 2: "Awwww snap! Damn these girls are fine."

Duder 1: "You ok man?"

Duder 2: "Yea doggy, I think I got some blue balls though."