A book written by some author who clearly hasn't gotten any in a while. In the book, a naïve little bitch named Anastasia Steele, likes to have sex with Christian Grey, who likes to have lots of kinky, hot, dirty sex, and even though she doesn't really like it all that much, she decides to stay with him for a while. They have sex in the tub and in the bedroom and pretty much everywhere, the book is basically about two people having nasty, naughty sex. The sex scenes are boring however, because Ana talks like a little innocent Mary Sue virgin, who acts reluctant instead of moaning like a good girl and an obedient little whore. I don't know, one of my friends showed me some scenes in the book, and they were pretty boring.
Here's a typical sex scene from 50 shades of Grey:
Ana (thinking): He's so hot! I must have him, I wonder what he'll do
Chris: Okay bitch, come here.
Chris (whips ana with something).
Ana thinks: This is just the beginning, it'll be over, I should enjoy this but I don't
Chris: Yeah....Now suck my cock
Ana: Okay (thinks) is this the good part, I'm hoping I do a good job, I wouldn't want him to leave me. Yes, I think it's good, he seems pleased, his dick is still hard, so in health class, that means he's excited. I wonder what will happen next
Chris: Good girl, good girl
Ana: (thinks) Yes... once more.
The book would have been more exciting if it had went like this.
Ana (spread eagle): Alright Chris, do whatever you like. (Shakes ass)
Chris: (Takes belt and hits ana with it) How you like that, bitch.
Ana: Yeah, do it again! I love that, hit that ass, hit that pussy!
Chris: Suck my cock bitch!
Ana: Gladly, mmm, yummy cock.
Chris: Moans, good girl, suck harder
The book would have been more entertaining to read if the scenes had been written like this. I apologize if I made you get hard.
A skeezer who is addicted to twerkin, especially while drunk! Usually a slutty ass ho who has gotten laid by 7 guys at the same time before entering middle school. These little skanks are usually found at school dances
in the middle of the room where people can see them. You should avoid sex with twerkoholics because they usually have more STD's than all the petri dishes in a laboratory.
Uggggh look at Tiffany grindin her little ass on George's dick. She thinks she's sexy but it looks like George is having buttsex with a fishing pole. Why does that scrawny bitch think she can just do that.
Aw Hellllllllll naw! I know I di'int jus see Law-kuee-shah shakin' her fatass in the middle of the gym. That ho think she be hot as fuck, but she ain't shit! I'm about ta smack a bitch.
Those ratchet ass girls in Mr. Ghetto's Walmart video were twerkoholics, b/c they were bouncing they asscheeks all over the whole motherfuckin store. They thought it was sexy to make their ass look like it was having a seizure in public, but no, it just made them look stupid.
To place your crotch over someone's face, and then to lower your pelvic region over his/her mouth. It's not quite teabagging
since your pants are still on, and your balls aren't going into his/her mouth. Since the teabag goes into the teacup, this act is known as teacupping.
Kelly got knocked over by Lyndon, and Lyndon proceeded to descend his genital region over Kelly's mouth. Kelly screamed, "Why the hell are you trying to teacup me." Lyndon said, "Cause you're a ho, you slept with all my male relatives, including me."
Krevon saw that his science teacher
Kelly got knocked over by Lyndon, and Lyndon proceeded to descend his genital region over Kelly's mouth. Kelly screamed, "Why the hell are you trying to teacup me." Lyndon said, "Cause you're a ho, you slept with all my male relatives, including me." This is what teacupping is.
Krevon saw that his science teacher had given him a D- on his exam, even though he had gotten all the answers right, and wrote thoroughly in the essay part. Therefore, he slipped some GHB
into Mrs. B Atch's coffee. When Mrs. B Atch went out cold
, Krevon lowered his balls over the teachers mouth and the scent of his ass woke her up. Krevon got suspended afterwards and he cussed that bitch out.
1.a delicious concoction of flour, brown sugar, butter, eggs, and chocolate chips.
2. A cure all for depressed women, followed only by chocolate and ice cream.
When Sally's man broke up with her, she curled up on the couch and put on Days of Our Lives
. She teared up as she consumed 3 gallons of raw cookie dough straight out of the bowl. Then she had 18 pints of Ben and Jerry's Cookie Dough flavored Ice cream. Now she is a fat ass bitch
and she'll never get a man again. Then she died of salmonella poisoning.
When you get period on your pubic hairs. This causes it to look like spaghetti with tomato sauce. It works best if you're blond.
Karyn, I think ran out of tampons, do you have any?
Sure, you need one right away, I can see your vaghetti poking out your skirt
Is his/her pubic hair the same color as his facial hair (eyebrows, eyelashes, side burns, mustache, beard)?
Hey, you've seen Christine, right.
Um, well, does the carpet match the blinds?
No, but the carpet matches the curtains
curtains: hair on head
upholstery: leg and arm hair
linens: back, chest, and tummy hair,
welcome mat: foot hair
cushions: butt hair