A complete piss-take on the Christian bible, dont look it up if you're offended by stuff like that, but if you want a good laugh, go for it!
Search it online, cant put the address on here, coz its advertising...But yeah.
The Queen James Mission Statement:
So, in short, our goal is to rewrite the entire Christian Bible. From Old Testament to New Testament, no word will be left unchanged. No moral will be left uncorrupted. No penis joke will be left unmade. It will be a tough, lengthy and probably fatal task, yet we shoulder the burden for the good of our fellow man.
Quotes from the Queen James Bible:
4:6 And God said unto Cain "Why art thou wroth? And why is thy countenance fallen?" to which Cain replied "What the fuck are you talking about, Shakespeare?"
4:7 God continued harping on about some bollocks, and Cain saw his brother humping a sheep in the distance. This wasn't Cain's day.