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17 definitions by the dirty liberal

 
1.
An STD one acquires from having sex with an extremely conservative woman. The first symptom is erectile dysfunction, followed by the extreme desire to impose conservative beliefs on everybody else. The only known cure is to have sex with a gay satanist.
Girl: You cheated on me with that conservative bitch next door, and now I'm pregnant. Guess I should go and get an abortion before I leave you.
Guy: No! I refuse! Abortions are the unholy work of the liberals!
Girl: I think you need to see a doctor.
Doctor: Well, there's no doubt about it. Your boyfriend has Ann Coulter Disease.
Girl: Is he going to be okay?
Doctor: Go find a gay satanist for him to have sex with, and he'll be just fine. Now let's get you an abortion.
by the dirty liberal June 15, 2009
 
2.
A word used to refer to many different japanese cartoons. Often worshipped by teenagers who really need to grow up and quit watching their stupid cartoons. Additionally, some of the terms are used for perverted inside jokes that aren't funny and that nobody understands. Not quite as annoying as disney, but it's a close second.
Girl 1: Oh my god! I love anime! It's my life!

Girl 2: Hey, I've got an idea. Let's go get some boys and (insert japanese phrase here)!

Girl 1: (giggles) you're dirty. (looks over at boy) Hey, you care to (insert japanese phrase here)?

Boy: No thanks. I think I'm gay now.

Girl 1: Then you would probably like (insert japanese cartoon name here)!
by the dirty liberal July 13, 2009
 
3.
The akward silence followed by hostility that quieter guys experience when talking to a girl. However, if a more outspoken guy says the exact same thing, it is tolerated and often respected. This occurs because of the assumption many (though not all) girls make that guys that don't talk much and keep to themselves are perverted.
Jackass: Care to hear a joke? (tells a dirty joke)

Girl: Hahahaha! That's funny. I'll have to remember that one.

Quieter Guy: (tells same dirty joke)

Girl: You perverted bastard! Is that all you ever think about? You'll never get any if you think jokes like that are funny. Go burn in hell, pervert!

Quieter Guy: Well, I'm probably not going to "get any" anytime soon anyway. God dammit, why do I always cause the Quiet Guy Effect no matter which girl I talk to?
by the dirty liberal July 14, 2009
 
4.
Roughly 95% of all the girls in your average high school. They are known for pairing themselves up with jackasses (roughly 90% of all the boys in an average high school). Usually if you're trying to get a girl and you're neither gay nor a jackass, you're S.O.L. until college
Ordinary Guy: You look nice today.

Girl: Stop looking at my boobs, you perverted bastard!

Ordinary Guy: Well, I'm sorry. If it's not on the menu, don't put it out there! Jesus Christ, what a bitch!

Jackass: You look nice today.

Girl: How about we go to your car and have sex?

Jackass: Sounds like a plan to me. Don't tell the other girls I stuff, okay?
by the dirty liberal July 13, 2009
 
5.
1. One who believes in retaining their childrens' innocence for a lot longer than it was meant to be around for.

2. A parent who refuses to acknowledge that one day their kids will learn about sex and drugs, as well as learn a few new "bad" words (crap, god, damn, etc.). They often refuse to tell their kids that sex exists while completely forgetting how their kids were created in the first place. Or that drugs are still out there, while not realizing how somebody got the idea of creating the disney channel, which is often the only TV channel their kids are allowed to watch
1. Guy 1: Look at that mother over there breastfeeding her kid. He's got to be at least ten

Guy 2: That's pretty fucked up. The mother must be a disney parent

2. Kid: Mom, what's a blowjob?
Mom: HOW DARE YOU!!! NEVER, EVER use that word again!
Kid: Why not?
Mother: Because it's a bad word. Now go watch the Disney channel.
by the dirty liberal July 13, 2009
 
6.
TDS is a condition in which younger drivers, particularly teenagers, begin driving like maniacs when there's absolutely no reason to do so. People with TDS don't usually realize their condition and thus blame it on the drivers who are forced to share the road with them.
Guy 1: That fucker cut me off!

Guy2: But you had the red light.

Guy 1: It doesn't matter! I was going to go and he cut me off!

Guy 2: Just let it go, man. It's not like we're in a hurry or anything.

Guy 1: I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch!

Guy 2: Slow down! You've got a really bad case of TDS today.

Guy 1: TDS?

Guy 2: Teenage Driver Syndrome
by the dirty liberal November 29, 2009
 
7.
The worst fucking drivers in the world
Guy 1: Holy shit! Look at that bitch swerve all over the road! Is that a soccer mom on crack?
Guy 2: Nope. It's just a couple teenage girls on their cell phones.
by the dirty liberal June 13, 2009