the cute hopeless romantic
the excuse you give your mother that you’re sleeping over her house or hanging out with her when in reality you’re with your boyfriend getting that dick.
chick: hey mom!! i'm going to alyssa's tonight. she makes amazing brownies and oreo truffles. mmm, so excited!
mom: okay sweetie.
*arrives to boyfriend's house*
chick's mind: ahh, the alyssa alibi.
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