look up any word, like sparkle pony:

16 definitions by the king cornholer

 
1.
When a wise mans wife or girl allows him to enjoy the aroma and taste of her bunghole as he spreads her ass cheeks wide and licks and sucks the taste right out of her turdcutter. When her gumhole is ready he lubes up real well and gently begins to enter her until he is balls deep and begins a slow pattern of pumping in and out of her dumper until he builds up a quick pistoning pattern. Holding on to her hips he dumps a big gooey load deep in her colon. Thus attaining the Anal Intruder title.
My chick let me be an Anal Intruder last night! What an experience, she tasted so good and her sphincter was so tight I blew a nut way too fast. Man I wanna do that again.
by The King Cornholer March 27, 2008
 
2.
The art of laying back and letting your wife or lady friend gently and gingerley lick away at your nutt sack. Slurping your balls in and out of her mouth and usually accompanied with her stroking your hard cock, hopefully, until you bust a large gooey load.
Rhonda caught me totally by surprise last night. While I was watching Lost on TV, she began rubbing my cock through my shorts and got me rock hard. She slid my shorts down to my ankles and was one hell of a Bag Lapper for me. And as a bonus she let explode in her mouth and swallowed every drop. I was in heaven.
by The King Cornholer April 10, 2008
 
3.
That lucky fellow who has a wife or girlfriend that likes to be spontaneous while having sex with her. After being a thorough Bung Licker and totally cleansing her stink star, he reaches for his Jack Juice and liberally coats his rock hard cock and her gumhole and proceeds to enter her balloon knot ever so slowly. Once he has buried his root, balls deep in her rectum, he begins a gentle pattern of slowly withdrawing and reentering her turdcutter. He gradually builds up speed, pistoning away until reaching the point of no return and gushing his man load deep inside her tailpipe, thus being her ever loving Rectum Rooter.
Todd: Hey Larry, you have never been so relaxed. What gives?

Larry: Man, Linda was one hell of a Bag Lapper last night and she begged me to be her Rectum Rooter as I was being a Bung Tounger. She didn't have to ask me twice. The Jack Juice made it one hell of great way to dump the biggest load I ever had in her tight as hell tailhole.

Todd: Damn, at least she wasn't a Bunghole Bandit. You lucky bastard.
by The King Cornholer April 15, 2008
 
4.
That lucky guy who has a wife or girlfriend that lets him get her up on all fours and proceed to play. He spreads her ass cheeks wide and applys his nose close to her balloon knot and slowly inhales the aroma of her stink star. Gentle licking and sucking causes her tastey gumhole to soften up as he prepares for penetration. Lubing up real well he inserts his rock hard cok in her anus and gradually pumps away building up too an awesome orgasm, dumping a massive load of man-goo deep in her rectum.
Dave: Steve, you ever had anal with Doris?

Steve: Man, I am her Rectal Spelunker and she loves it!
by The King Cornholer April 06, 2008
 
5.
A wise man who has a wife or female friend who lets him spread her ass cheeks wide, apply his nose close to her turdhole and slowly inhale the delicious fragrance of her rosebud. Applying his tounge, he slowly licks and sucks the tastey residue from around and in her bunghole.
There's nothing better than spreding my girls ass cheeks and being her Bung Tounger. When I'm done she usually lets me cornhole her and bust a gushing nut deep in her rectum.
by The King Cornholer March 30, 2008
 
6.
The wise fellow who has a wife or female friend who allows him to spread her ass cheeks wide and press his nose close to her bunghole and slowly inhale the delicious aroma of her tail end. Gently licking her balloon knot, tasting the residue left from a few days of not bathing. Licking the taste away and enjoying every second of it. Stabbing the tounge in and out of her sphincter also increases the experience as well as increases the chance of bringing her to anal orgasm.
Gayle and I had a hell of a good time at the Adult Movie Awards. We retired back to our suite and when the door closed, she raised her skirt and pulled her soaked panties down and bent over the back of the couch with her knees on the cushions, legs spread wide. I knew what she wanted. I kicked my shoes off and knelt behind her. Spread her beautiful butt cheeks wide and was her Bung Licker for the evening.
by The King Cornholer March 28, 2008
 
7.
The often overlooked and ignored aspect of a womans body. Located a mere few inches from her most pleasurable of sexual entrances. Small in size and when properly treated, can bring her and her man ultimate pleasure. Its aroma is amazing and its taste, tangy and zesty. The only place a man can get an ass tortilla or be a bung tonguer. Ones penis can find much pleasure and entertainment there when properly approaching your lady for some fine cornhole action or even just to be a Bum Sniffer. Its form fitting shape is snug against the erect penis and can cause extreme and copius orgasms. A Rectum Rooter sweet spot.
Dave: Hey Frank, why the hell is Steve in such a good mood today.
Frank: His wedding anniversary was this weekend.
Dave: So.
Frank: That's the only time hise wife lets him explore her Turdcutter.
Dave: Now I understand.
by The King Cornholer April 19, 2008