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4 definitions by team mastadon

 
1.
the act of a female (or male) sneaking into a janitor's closet and creaping up on and giving head to an unsuspecting sleeping janitor without awaking him. should one fail, and awake the sleeping janitor, he will be forced to execute the snake ambush.
Laqueesha: Hey girlfriend, what you doin?
Shenainai: Yea La, i just got away with the shadow mongoose on that new janitor.
Laqheesha: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH. You's is one sly biach, SISTAAAA.
by team mastadon January 10, 2005
 
2.
dual fisting: a sexual move consisting of the insertion of one of the males fists into each of the females holes (anus and vagina)
jamaal: dude your hands smell like shit
guunter: yea man, its cause i pulled the mastadon on susie last night
by team mastadon January 08, 2005
 
3.
the counterattack that a janitor will execute upon waking up during a shadow mongoose resulting in the janitor biting your nose off, which can be very unfavorable. one should take necessary precautions to not allow this to happen and if you are unsure or affraid of this happening to you its best not to attempt the shadow mongoose as it is a very skillful maneuver.
Kichwa: Yo Enya. What happened to yo nose?
Enya: Oh Kichwa, the other day i was going for the shadow mongoose and i accidently hiccuped and that motha woke up and did one of 'dem snake ambushes on me.
Kichwa: Aww. Girl i feel bad for you. You need anything you let me know, aight?
Enya: Thanks Kichwa, your a good guy, im glad to have you as a friend
(Enya leaves the room)
Kichwa: OOOOOOooooOOOOooo EMOOOOOO my life is so bad. i wish i could tell her how i feel. OOOOOoooooOOOOOooooo EMOOOOOOOoooooOOOOOOooo.
by team mastadon January 10, 2005
 
4.
a very complex sexual maneuver involving multiple steps: first the female arrouses the male, causing him to ejaculate. the male must then attempt to catch his goo in his belly button, from which the female takes it as a body shot. the female then spits it into the males hair, thus completing the execution of the crafty diplomat.
Xavior: AAAAAhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaahhhhh. I used a load of shampoo and washed it like ten times but my hair is still sticky.
Malik: Dude what did you do?
Xavior: Oh me and my girlfriend were just trying out the crafty diplomat last night after we read about it on urbandictionary.com and i can't get all of it out of my hair now.
Malik: uhh. cant help you there man, i never seem to have that problem.
Xavior: thanks anyways.
Malik: no problem.
by team mastadon January 10, 2005