A fat and short plumber that the only way he can get laid is is to save the princess from Bowser. He eats shrooms to grow higher. To give an example of how much he wants to get laid: hes willing to bust bricks with his head. But you, have a better chance of getting laid if you stay big, so don't get hit or you'll shrink.
Save the princess quick,
Because she wants a dick.
And if you let her free,
You get the pussy.
-benefit - Super Mario Bros. Rap