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3 definitions by phalon

 
1.
The electronic version of getting a blow job for a job well done, deserved or undeserved. If deserved an excellent way to scork yourself by means of printing the eBlowJob and mailing it, framing it, etc. If undeserved it can be forwarded as an excellent way to eShit on someone, especially the schmuck-on-wheels who deserved it in the first place.
I just shit on Jason by hitting goal first, so my boss sent me an eBlowJob and asked me if I wanted a shrimp cocktail when I get off of work. Hussah!

There's an opening! If you eBlowJob me quick I'll be sure to get the position!
by phalon May 18, 2009
 
2.
The electronic version of getting shitted on. Usually in the form of an email or other forms of electronic communication. A very effective way to shit on someone because of the option to have the eShit forwarded or having multiple recipients tied into the eShit via cc or bcc.
The job recruiter is doubting my candidacy for the position so I sent her an eShit saying "Thank you" and a list of references that know I can do a kick ass job.

That bitch stole my client. I'm gonna eShit on her and bcc her boss...
by phalon May 18, 2009
 
3.
the need to boastfully update one's facebook status for the purpose of informing those within their social network of their current activities, whereabouts, successes, casual and sexual affairs, opinions, interests, moods, and social connections. mostly via text, pictures, web site links and video clips. usually posted in real-time for maximum effect.
guy 1: "dude, SHOTS!"

guy 2: "hold on dude, I haven't updated my facebook in like two hours. let's take a pic first and show face."

guy 1: "word, jamie and lynn totally dissed us for that loser todd. make sure the hot bartender is behind us."
by phalon August 02, 2009